“‘Anyway, I know I’ve been a fuckup and I want you to know your tuition money wasn’t a total waste, yeah, Dad told me what you did for me, spending your college savings to send my dumb ass to rehab again. It means a lot to me that you believed in me, and I love you for your optimism. Which brings me to my next point. I’m totally gonna get fucked up tonight, I’ve already got it on me. Sorry dude, but I need one last hurrah before I go on the straight and narrow forever. You see, I couldn’t remember my last time … the last time I used, and that seemed weird to me, and so I wanted to make it an event. I know this sounds like I’m rationalizing, and maybe I am. Remember what they say, never trust a junkie, but that’s my fucking story and I’m sticking to it.

“‘Here’s the plan. I’m gonna party with my girl in a hotel like a true pimp 4 realz, but before I do I’m gonna tell her, like I’m tellin’ you, that it’s my last time because I want to marry her and spend the rest of my dumbass dish-washing days with her forever. You’d totally dig her, man. She’s hot, sexy, funny as hell, and best of all she calls me on my shit, which you know I need. I love her. She’s made me a believer that there is something better out there for me than drugs. I can’t wait for you to meet her. She and I have some big plans, which include buying a junker and driving cross-country to see about a boy … and that boy is you. My kid brother. Because I love you and if I’ve learned anything at all about life from the movies, it’s that when you feel something big and know something bigger you share it with the world.

“‘Your brother forever, Nicholas.

“‘P.S. Oh yeah, start writing your wedding toast ’cause I’m pretty sure I’m gonna be the first of us to need one. Knock that best man speech out of the fucking park!

“‘P.P.S. Memberberry how I said I wasn’t feelin’ Kendrick Lamar? Natalia likes him, so I’m givin him another go. If that don’t prove my love than nuthin’ will.’”

Dustin folded the letter and put it back in his inner pocket, and when he looked out at the crowd he saw that people were crying but people were smiling, too.

“Well, that was all Nicholas had to say, and so that about sums it up. Nicholas, it was an honor to be your brother and I’m gonna miss you every day. Okay, Rabbi Kennison, take it away…”

XVI