Tony cleared his throat. ‘Yeah, about that trip to the Pecos. I don’t want you to think less of me, but I’ll be honest. I pretty much hated everything about myself, and I was seriously considering ending it all. I’d gone out hunting that morning, and I spotted an elk, but I was distracted, and my aim was off, so I only managed to injure it. It was when I was tracking it that I realized I just couldn’t do anything right anymore, so I felt like I might as well just put myself out of misery. But then by pure chance, I stumbled on the girls, and something shifted inside me. I was more determined than I ever remember being to save them.’

‘Redemption, personal and professional,’ Alyssa said softly. ‘Not that I think you needed to redeem yourself, but that’s what drove you. That and being the amazing person and law enforcement officer that you are. Maybe you couldn’t save all the girls from The Toybox, but you damned well saved Addis and Emerson. Thank God you were in the right place at the right time. Ever wonder why that is?’

In answer, Tony blushed.

‘Thank you for sharing all this with me, and while I’m not going to say anything to the others, I think you should, especially Joe. But that’s for you to decide. Either way, I’ve got your back. But I do have one more question for you. Why didn’t you tell us? It had to have been more than guilt.’

A rush of color exploded onto Tony’s face. ‘Honestly? Because of you.’

If he’d slapped her, Alyssa couldn’t have been more stunned. ‘Me?’

‘Yes. After everything you’ve been through this year with both your kids being targets of some seriously crazed nutjobs and finding out you have a serial killer in your family… If you could come through all that, seemingly unscathed, what right did I have to feel trauma over not reporting something, you know?’

‘No, I don’t know. But do you want to know why I seem unscathed? Because I have the best people surrounding me, people who are my teammates and my friends. So, next time, you remember you can come to us. Any or all of us. You got it?’

Tony’s eyes glassed over. ‘Thanks, Lys. And thanks for understanding. I’ll see you tomorrow.’

‘There’s nothing to understand.’ Alyssa touched Tony’s arm as he moved towards the door. ‘And I’m going to encourage you to get back into counseling.’ When he opened his mouth to protest, she cut him off. ‘I can always sic Isaac on you. He’ll give you a dissertation on the merits of talking to someone. You know I’ll do it, too.’ She was relieved when Tony chuckled.

‘I’ll think about it,’ he promised.