“No. Because if you ever did die on me, I’m quite sure I would get a phone call from heaven. Either that, or you would haunt me like a ghost.”

“That’s not funny, boy. Have you talked to your sister lately?”

I strolled out into my living room and sat in my brown leather La-Z-Boy chair to relax.

“No. What’s going on with her?” I asked.

I didn’t talk to my family a whole lot. I liked the peace of mind that space and time afforded me away from my kinfolk and old friends. I mean, I loved them all, but I didn’t see why I couldn’t love them from a distance. Of course, I was forced to talk to my mother the most. She had made absolutely sure of that.

“Well, I need you to talk to Nita and explain to her that a guy does not want to be held hostage by a baby. And I know that firsthand because your father damn sure didn’t—with either one of you or with any of his others. You would have thought he would have stopped and learned his lesson after a while.”

My mother never pulled any punches when it came to my father. He was a true rolling stone with zero marriages and six kids from four women. My mother was my father’s second baby’s momma with two kids. I had an older half sister from his first baby’s mama, two younger half sisters from his third, and a lone half brother from my father’s fourth. Talk about a crazy family. That’s why I loved my space and peace of mind.

I asked my mother, “What do you want me to say to her? Juanita knows how men think by now. She’s had plenty of opportunities to do the right thing and to choose the right guys, but she chooses not to. Does she want to hear that from me? No. End of conversation.”

“But you’re her big brother.”

“And I hold absolutely no weight with her. She’s a grown woman like I’m a grown man.”

I didn’t talk about it with my mother, but I had been guilty of sleeping with at least three of my sister’s high school and college girlfriends. Juanita had some good-looking friends, and they were very much into the big brother adulation thing. Should I have taken advantage of that? Probably not. But what was done was done. I couldn’t put the serpent back in my pants after I had done it. And boy did I do it. I had a couple of Juanita’s friends fighting over me. Mom just ignored it all. Kids will be kids.

“Well, she’s just getting herself involved in the same old…”

My mother trailed off with her comment. I understood her though. How many life lessons were we all ignoring from those who came before us? So my sister went ahead and got involved with a professional basketball player from the Indiana Pacers, got pregnant by him, cussed out, ignored for several months, and she still wanted to have this guy’s unwanted baby. And what could I do about it? I told her to have an abortion. It looked like another lifelong disaster to me. Juanita was convinced that the guy’s attitude would change. Fat chance. But she wouldn’t listen to me.