“It burns,” she said. “I’m going to go wash my face. Then I’ll go to the apartment.”

“I’ll come.”

“No,” she said. “No. You’ve got to figure this out, and I… if I can’t use Rain for more control then I want to go to my place, my room, and lock the door, and just… lose all control. Alone.”

“You sure?”

“No,” she said. “Yes. But I’ve got to figure out how I’m going forward and I can’t keep leaning on people. I’ve got to pull my own weight.”

“After a day as shitty as this one, there isn’t a rational, sane soul out there who would blame you for turning to friends or wanting company.”

“Then I guess I’m not rational or sane,” she replied. She forced a smile, “Kidding. Half kidding. And washing my face.”

“Okay,” I said.

I walked over to the window to see who the ‘guest’ was. Tattletale, who had stepped out of the car, while Snuff remained in the driver’s seat. No tiny Chicken Little head peering out the window in the backseat, and no birdcage.

The bathroom door shut.

“Um, hi.”

“You were listening?”

“Ashley was trying to listen at the door and you were here, so I thought it might be okay. Nobody told me not to listen.”

“Communications blackout, Kenz,” I said, turning toward the computer. “You were told to turn everything off and step away. This stuff is messy.”

“It’s my own private line and channel. And I checked everything once I heard why. I think they can’t get in.”

I sighed.

“The diary isn’t real?” Kenzie asked.

I stared out the window, watching the group and Weld talk to Tattletale. She pointed at me mid-sentence.

I digested the ramifications of Kenzie’s question. Fucking what? When? How bad was this?

Was it possible to be offended she read my diary when the diary wasn’t real?

“No, Kenzie. It’s not real.”

“Oh.”

“Did you read it?”

“Uh huh.”

“When?”

“A few weeks back. I was making sure I had everything I needed for the move, I backed up everyone’s stuff in case some tinker thing I didn’t pay enough attention to or let fall between my desk and the wall went kablooie and took everyone’s computers out with it. I realized I had it when I did a search for something and it popped up, read a bit before realizing.”

“You read ‘a bit’?”

“I read most of it. I got lonely while with my new team, even though I’m only technically not a member of Breakthrough anymore. I missed you guys, I wondered what I missed so I read more. It’s really not real?”

“No, Kenz. I didn’t type a word of it.”

“Okay. That’s too bad.”

“Why—Kenzie, why is it bad?”