“How’s your throat baby?” she asked. It took me a second to realize she was asking how the baby was, not calling me baby. It was like a slap in the face. She went on, “Are congratulations in order?”

I shivered. Still feeling the cold, still aware my defenses were down. The clerk took my money.

“No congratulations,” I said, my voice a bit of a croak. “I pulled out what I’m estimating was four pounds of baby from my throat. Our friend that we just dropped off at the clinic got a seven pounder, I’m guessing, not counting all the rest of the stuff that was attached.”

“Gag.”

“Tell me about it. I’m about to gag just remembering it, and don’t get me started on the smell—”

The clerk averted his eyes as I looked at him. Yeah.

“We called ahead, they were ready to get her on her way to a hospital as soon as we showed. They’re answering questions and filling in the clinic staff so they know what’s up.”

“Right on. I hope she’s okay. Hometown pride, you know?”

“I know.”

“Gotta hold on to stuff.”

“I know,” I said.

The clerk handed me my receipt. I took my stuff, raised my eyebrows for him as he stared at me, then headed out the door. I flew to the parking lot by the clinic, and I saw they hadn’t left yet.

Cold as it was, I decided to stay in the air.

I noticed the silence, and I wasn’t sure if it was a painful, awkward one. “You were talking about it before. Holding on to stuff. The hallucinations.”

“I slapped my forehead after hanging up, cringing for bringing it up,” she said, almost groaning out the words. “I don’t know why I did.”

“Was Dean one of them?”

“Yeah,” she said. I could hear her voice over the phone, and the groan was gone. Almost a relief.

“Was he angry?”

“He wouldn’t be angry, or he wouldn’t be Dean if he was.”

“He got angry sometimes.”

“But he wouldn’t be angry. He wouldn’t stay that way. He was just… better than, you know?”

“Absolutely,” I said, quiet.

“My therapist got so cranky about it. We’ve got people who can see through walls. Capable people. I know someone who got stuck in a circumstance after an incident, she missed her time window to change back a few dozen times and now she just stays a giant magenta cat made of energy. And a certain someone was strong enough to deal with being hospitalized for years after—”

I cleared my throat. A second after doing it, I wasn’t sure if I’d done it intentionally to interrupt or if it was an accident.