Even in the mist of that boozy afternoon, Lana found Patricia’s murderous choice of words a bit disconcerting. Nonetheless, she’d gone ahead with Patricia’s mad plan, and by six o’clock that night she’d booked them both on to a flight to Nicosia the following day, so that they could attend the funeral of George Harris.

Outside the church now, Lana turned to Patricia. ‘I think we’d better go.’ It seemed only wise to get out of the way, given that the kerfuffle Patricia’s presence had caused was now spreading through the church, creating the distinct impression that they were very unwelcome.

Minutes later, as they sat on the little church bench in the Cypriot sun, Lana reflected on the behemoth mistake she’d made. What the fuck was I thinking?

‘What the fuck were you thinking?’ It was Judith, now heading her way with Gareth and Catrin in tow.

Bizarrely, Patricia – Lana’s new best friend – came to her defence.

‘Ey, now just a minute, lady!’ she snapped at her daughter, caring not a jot about the fact that they’d just abandoned a funeral service attended by a hundred grieving Greek Cypriots. ‘This was my idea. I wanted to pay my respects. And she said she’d help me do it. So you say sorry to her now, d’you hear?’

Lana was mortified. ‘Patricia, it’s fine, really …’ she mumbled. But it was pointless. Judith stood there, defiant.

‘All you wanted, Mother, was to cause drama and chaos and upset. Just as you always do. And why the hell you went along with it, Lana, I really don’t know. Jesus! Why in God’s name would I want her at my father’s funeral?’

Mourners from the church had started to gather around them now and the atmosphere was becoming slightly menacing. Judith carried on. She was on a roll. ‘And more to the point, why would I want you here, Lana?’

Lana looked up at her, shock and hurt hurtling through her veins.

Catrin intervened. ‘To be fair, Jude, it was me that—’

But Lana spoke over her. ‘I’m here because we used to be best friends,’ she said quietly. ‘And I loved your dad, and I wanted to support you.’

Judith stared back at her – was it disdain or disgust on her face?

‘Well, I don’t want your support, Lana, and I certainly don’t need your friendship,’ she said, her voice getting louder and more hysterical. ‘I’ve survived all these years without it, and your antics today have proved more than ever that you don’t belong in my life. Now take my joke of a useless mother and leave.’

Patricia objected loudly, ‘Ey, listen here …’

Lana tried to apologize. ‘I’m sorry, it was stupid of me and—’

But Judith was having none of it.

It was done.

Over.

‘Just go,’ she said. ‘GO!!!’

It was weeks before Lana returned any of Catrin’s calls. The humiliation she felt after what she’d done was crushing and she couldn’t bear to discuss it. Because that would mean reliving the shame.