‘What does Penny say?’ I ask.

‘She hasn’t responded yet.’

‘That means she thinks it’s a mistake.’

‘No. Penny’s a total romantic. She’ll be on board. Look! See? She just replied with about fifty love hearts.’ Harper holds up her phone.

This is lovely but it doesn’t give me any guidance on what I should be doing right now or when Jesse comes back. I swallow down my urge to say this, because I am trying to convince Harper it will be very easy and low drama to live with a couple and, so far, I haven’t been a shining example of this.

I sit down on the couch again and nibble at the chip. My stomach is churning.

‘Do you want to watch a movie?’ Harper says. ‘As a distraction.’

‘Sure,’ I say. I do not want to watch a movie. I have so much anxious energy inside me right now I could power a flight to the moon. Harper starts scrolling through Netflix, saying, ‘No, no, no, seen it, hate him, really hate him, god there’s nothing to watch, oh wait, what about this?’

‘Looks good,’ I say, without even registering what it is. I stare blankly at the screen, trying to formulate a plan for when Jesse returns, but my mind is refusing to be productive. It’s gone mushy and only wants to replay the moment Jesse said I am so in love with you. Did that really happen? Yes, but I’m sure the universe is going to find a way to take it away and I need to be ready.

I hear the front door shut, and then Jesse walks into the room.

‘Hi,’ I say, standing up and then sitting down again. Smooth.

‘Hi,’ he says, sounding almost shy.

Harper looks between us, biting on her bottom lip. ‘Please tell me you were extremely kind and polite and grovelling to Amber,’ she says to Jesse.

‘I was,’ Jesse says. ‘I said sorry at least ten times.’

I feel guilty, especially as I haven’t even been thinking about Amber. Her date with Jesse has turned out even worse than my first date with Henry.

‘Did you leave on good terms?’ Harper asks.

‘Yes, if you count her calling me a dickhead and then ringing her ex-boyfriend to pick her up as being on good terms. Oh, and she also said she only went on the date as a favour to you and Penny,’ Jesse says.

Harper makes a face and stands up.

‘I’m going to go and call her and make sure she really is okay, and be extremely kind and polite and grovelling to her myself.’ ‘Should I send her flowers as an apology or something?’ I ask. ‘Or a fruit platter?’ For the good karma, if nothing else.

‘No,’ Jesse and Harper say in unison, and then look at each other and smile.