As I was standing on the edge I was thinking that if I weren’t so terrified of pain, I’d probably be one of those depressed chicks who cuts. But for now just standing on a retaining wall was plenty psycho for me. I made myself turn around and look out at the lake. It wasn’t so scary if I kept my eyes on the horizon. But dip too high or too low …

“Do you feel it?” Kori whispered, her voice hovering in the air like one of her smoky exhales.

I swallowed as I leaned just enough to look down the slick planes of rock. I did feel something. Something I couldn’t turn away from. A grip in my gut and the sudden need for air.

“It isn’t fear, is it? It’s anticipation. Like the last rush of heartbeats before a hot guy moves in for a kiss. Addictive, isn’t it?”

Slowly I ran my gaze down the length of one blade-sharp edge. In the moonlight it looked silver and crazy ragged, like a hunting knife. I imagined the blood it would draw, and shuddered. But just as I stepped backward, I heard Kori scream.

“Don’t fall!” exploded in my ear as she pitched me forward with her shove.

Her arms caught me around my hips, yanking me off the ledge and against her as she started singing Shakira and making me dance crazy.

“What the hell did you do that for?!” I jerked away from her, doubled over in case I might puke.

“Relax, kitten, what are you afraid of?”

“Easy for you to say!” I gasped, pulling in air. Several breaths later, I was able to bring her into focus. My fingernails had dug so deep into her forearms that blood dripped from the crescent indentations. She scarcely noticed.

“Living won’t kill you.” She smirked at my doubtful expression. “What? You aren’t going to die tonight. So for one night only, you can do anything you want to.”

I was still so scared, so mad, I was spitting my words. “How do you know.”

It wasn’t really a question, but she had an answer. “It’s too soon.” She said it simply, as if that was all there was to life and death.

I drilled her with my eyes.

“What? Are you honestly telling me you’ve done everything you want? I sure as hell haven’t. I don’t want to leave anything undone.”

“It doesn’t work like that,” I said through my teeth. “You could have killed me!”

“I would never let anything bad happen to you, kitten. I was in complete control. Reflexes like a cat,” she retorted. “But what if the worst happened? Are you ready, Serena? Are you?”

A sick feeling slithered into my stomach, snapping my emotions from anger to unease. “Don’t say things like that. Don’t put that out there.”

She looked around. “Out where?”