Around this sharply-etched central figure other, slightly less well-defined faces could be discerned among the tangled thickets of argument. Macintosh, Plushkov, Chiddingfold, Nunn – they all looked to him hopefully for a lead. He found himself backing away from the thickets containing Riddle and Goldwasser. There was something about them . . . well, something that didn’t exactly inspire confidence. Not their sexual eccentricities, of course. It could scarcely be that, seeing that he was a man of whom the reviewers had written – or would write, as soon as the opportunity arose – ‘His broad understanding of the world of human nature is proverbial.’ There were enough small high breasts in his novel to guarantee his broad-mindedness on that score. But there was something about them that was not quite sound. Those petitions that Riddle put about, for instance. Not really the sort of thing sound people did. And Goldwasser. It was difficult to pin down exactly what he objected to about Goldwasser. He had an intuitive feeling that he was not a very good judge of literature. Then again, there was something rather flippant about him. He was a man whose loyalty to his friends could not in certain circumstances be relied on. Well, to put it rather crudely, he was not a man to whom one would want to show, say, a book on which one was working.

Anyway, when the time came to vote on the proposal to paint imaginary curtains in the windows of the disused storeroom at the back of the International Affairs Department, Macintosh failed to turn up, Goldwasser never heard what the proposal was, Riddle said scarcely enough against it for Haugh to agree with her even temporarily, and Rowe consciously and deliberately voted in favour.

He felt a sense of release at his decision. At last he was shaking off the fetters of youth and leaving irresponsibility behind. At last he was becoming a sound man.

19

19

Where on earth does one buy a pair of ceremonial gold tape-cutting scissors? The Protocol Committee did not know, and asked the Sub-Committee on Ceremonial. The Sub-Committee on Ceremonial turned in bewilderment to the Joint Advisory Committee on Protocol and Ceremonial, and the Joint Advisory Committee on Protocol and Ceremonial, on Haugh’s advice, asked Haugh.

Haugh rapidly found a magazine called Ceremonial Ware News, and from the advertisements there selected a firm called the Empire Ceremonial Supply Company, Limited, which looked as if it catered for the better-class trade, and was a member of the Ceremonial Waremongers’ Fidelity Guarantee Scheme.

‘Ceremonial golden scissors?’ said the manager when Haugh visited their showrooms. ‘Certainly, sir. Made-to-measure? Or can I show you something from our comprehensive range of ready-to-use ware? They’re very popular in these busy days.