That’s another reason the accidentally flipped fangbangers usually don’t survive. Not many older vampires are willing to take responsibility for controlling and educating the new vamp.

I’m always astonished when I read about someone who wants to become a vampire. There are actually people who are willing to give up the daylight for the night, who have no problem with the idea of watching all their loved ones wither and grow old. I guess they want the enhanced speed and strength and the glamour ability more than they want their human life. Are they just scared of dying? I don’t understand it. A wooden stake through the heart will take them out in a jiffy. They’re not stake-proof, and a beheading will end anyone’s existence, vamp or human.

It’s true that a vampire cannot cross the threshold of a private home uninvited—the resident has to say the express words to allow the vamp to enter. Even more interesting, that permission can be revoked, rendering a home safe from vampire intrusion. I’ve had a little fun with that rule myself in the past, and it’s good to know that it works.

All in all, there are times that I regret ever setting eyes on a vampire, or even seeing a six-pack of TrueBlood at the convenience store, but in the end you have to adapt to the world around you. I’ve become pretty good at adapting.

THE TWO-NATURED

When the vampires let people know that they were real, everyone thought that the world had been turned upside down. Heck, the first time I met an actual vampire, my universe did turn upside down. Of course, I fell in love with him. If I hadn’t, my life might have stayed on more of a predictable path.

Finding out shortly thereafter that some people can change themselves into other creatures was another serious shock. My favorite boss, Sam Merlotte, was the first person I saw in both forms.

There are apparently two kinds of the two-natured: shifters, who can change into any type of animal, and weres, who change into only one animal. By far the most numerous clan is the werewolves, and they’re so proud of that that they just refer to themselves as Weres, with a capital W. Of course, in the strictest sense, they’re all shapeshifters. They can change their physical form. But you wouldn’t ever hear a Were refer to himself as a shapeshifter, and Sam would never call himself a were-anything.