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Contents (121)
  1. THE SILENCE
  2. Susan Allott
  3. Copyright
  4. Praise for The Silence:
  5. Dedication
  6. 1
  7. London, 1997
  8. 2
  9. Sydney, 1966
  10. 3
  11. Ivanhoe, New South Wales, 1966
  12. 4
  13. Sydney, 1967
  14. 5
  15. Sydney, 1967
  16. 6
  17. Sydney, 1997
  18. 7
  19. Sydney, 1967
  20. 8
  21. Sydney, 1967
  22. 9
  23. Sydney, 1967
  24. 10
  25. Sydney, 1967
  26. 11
  27. Sydney, 1997
  28. 12
  29. Sydney, 1967
  30. 13
  31. Sydney, 1967
  32. 14
  33. Sydney, 1997
  34. 15
  35. Sydney, 1967
  36. 16
  37. Sydney, 1967
  38. 17
  39. Leeds, 1967
  40. 18
  41. Sydney, 1967
  42. 19
  43. Sydney, 1997
  44. 20
  45. Sydney, 1967
  46. 21
  47. Ivanhoe, 1967
  48. 22
  49. Leeds, 1967
  50. 23
  51. Sydney, 1997
  52. 24
  53. Sydney, 1967
  54. 25
  55. Sydney, 1997
  56. 26
  57. Sydney, 1967
  58. 27
  59. Sydney, 1967
  60. 28
  61. Sydney, 1997
  62. 29
  63. Sydney, 1967
  64. 30
  65. Sydney, 1967
  66. 31
  67. New South Wales, 1997
  68. 32
  69. Sydney, 1967
  70. 33
  71. Sydney, 1967
  72. 34
  73. Sydney, 1997
  74. 35
  75. Sydney, 1967
  76. 36
  77. Sydney, 1967
  78. 37
  79. Sydney, 1997
  80. 38
  81. Sydney, 1967
  82. 39
  83. Leeds, 1967
  84. 40
  85. Sydney, 1967
  86. 41
  87. Sydney, 1997
  88. 42
  89. Sydney, 1967
  90. 43
  91. Victoria, 1967
  92. 44
  93. Sydney, 1997
  94. 45
  95. Victoria, 1967
  96. 46
  97. Sydney, 1967
  98. 47
  99. Sydney 1997
  100. 48
  101. Sydney, 1997
  102. 49
  103. Sydney, 1997
  104. 50
  105. Sydney, 1997
  106. 51
  107. Victoria, 1967
  108. 52
  109. New South Wales, 1997
  110. 53
  111. Leeds, 1967
  112. 54
  113. Sydney, 1997
  114. Author’s Note
  115. Notes
  116. A note about language
  117. Acknowledgements
  118. Questions for Reading Groups
  119. Erin Kelly interviews Susan Allott
  120. About the Author
  121. About the Publisher

She walked around the truck to where Steve was standing. ‘You want a divorce?’

‘It’s the best thing.’ He thumped the roof of the truck with the palm of his hand. The veins were pronounced at his temples. ‘I need to build my life back up, Mandy. I need to get out of this.’

Steve moved to take William from her and she took a step backwards. Her throat was tight, her words painful. ‘Will you at least tell me where you’re headed? I need to know where you both are. Please.’

He considered her a while. ‘Marlo,’ he said, eventually. He held his hands out for William. ‘I thought we’d head for Marlo.’

‘The cabin?’

‘That’s right. Not sure how long we’ll stop there, mind. Depends how long it takes to sell up.’

‘Sell up?’

‘The house.’

‘What?’ Steve reached out again and she turned away. Her blouse was soaked through with her own sweat and the boy’s body heat. ‘You’re selling the house?’

‘That’s right. I’ll give you half of whatever I get for it. I’ve left some cash on the kitchen table to last you till then.’

‘Steve, I don’t want this. Please don’t go.’

Steve put his hands under William’s arms and peeled his body away from hers. She let out a moan as he did it, a noise she didn’t recognise. The baby’s warmth stayed in her fingers and she held them to her face. Her moan became deeper and louder until she was sobbing from the base of her throat and she couldn’t speak and there were no words anyway, she had nothing left to say. She reached out to Steve, gripped his arm, but he shook her off. The coldness in him was impenetrable. She was making a scene in full view of the whole street and he seemed barely to notice.

He put the baby in a blanket box at the foot of the passenger seat and handed him a teether. She knelt down at the side of the truck, her knees burning on the bitumen, and kissed the crown of the boy’s head. She let him grab her hair, her clothes. She wailed into the soft pit of his neck.

‘Will you calm down, Amanda?’

She stood and made an effort to catch her breath. She wiped her face. ‘Are you trying to punish me?’

He slammed the passenger door and walked around to the driver’s side. ‘The bills are all paid up in advance,’ he said, as if she hadn’t spoken. ‘I’ll be in touch when I’ve got the house on the market.’

She stood hopelessly by as he climbed into the truck. He was a stranger to her. This was the way he was when he took children away; she could see it now, the man he became. Focused and powerful, ruthless. Was this the man William’s mum had met? Was this how she felt?

‘Don’t do this!’ She screamed at him, gulping for air. ‘Please don’t go!’

Bay Street was bright and calm, indifferent. A few yards away, Douglas Blunt snipped rhythmically at his hedge.