‘Down girl,’ he’d replied, grinning. They’d been like that every time they’d spoken. They both knew what it was all a prelude to.

Penny squinted in the low autumn light. ‘Urggghhh,’ she said, beginning to walk, very slowly, towards where he stood. He was wearing head-to-toe North Face in an orange camouflage print and his breath made clouds in front of him as he exhaled. ‘Urgh, urgh, urgh! I’ve been tricked! You said this would be fun.’

‘Yes! You’re doing it! Good girl! Come on!’

‘Oh wow,’ said Penny. ‘Okay, dude, let me just fill you in: one, I’m not a girl, I am a woman. I wouldn’t call you boy, because you’re not nine. Well, physically, anyway. Mentally, the jury is out.’

‘Toilet humour is still humour,’ said Thomas, mock-defensively.

‘And two,’ she was closer to him now. ‘I am also not a dog. Do not cheer me on like I am a Labrador that just brought you the paper.’

As she reached him he put out a hand and patted her head. ‘Good girl,’ he said in a silly voice, and Penny rolled her eyes. ‘Now turn around.’

Penny turned around from the way she’d come, and across the small valley she could see a huge manor house, surrounded by manicured gardens and pathways.

‘Oh gosh,’ she said, genuinely impressed. ‘That’s beautiful.’

‘It’s Haddon Hall,’ Thomas said. ‘It’s a Tudor hall, but the gardens are Elizabethan. Stunning, huh?’

‘I wonder who lives there now,’ Penny admired.

‘Oh, actually. I know that.’

‘Of course you do,’ Penny said. ‘Of course. By the way, what’s my surprise?’

Thomas rolled his eyes. ‘This view isn’t surprise enough?’ he asked.

Penny blinked at him, her face unimpressed.

‘Well, not that you are a Labrador bringing me the paper but I have treats, too.’

He rummaged in his backpack and handed her a bottle of water and opened a cereal bar, taking half and passing her the rest. Penny plopped down onto the cold, dry grass, thankful for the break.

‘So who lives there?’ she said, relishing the sweetness of the snack and feeling revived almost instantly.

‘The brother of the Duke of Rutland,’ he said, ‘whose daughter I met on a boat in the Greek islands and with whom I may have had a small liaison, resulting in an invitation to spend the weekend there a few years ago. Very cold. Impossible to heat such a big place.’

‘I can imagine,’ Penny said. ‘It didn’t work out with the daughter?’