At first, Jesse aimed his laser at everything in sight, saying “Maybe this? Or this?” And I said, “Definitely!” no matter what it was. He pointed at a set of solid-gold salt and pepper shakers, at a gigantic fork, and at a three-hundred-dollar cheese. I kept laughing and saying “Definitely!” and then Jesse would click his laser and add it to our list, and I would laugh harder. Then he pointed his laser at some guy’s shoes, and I couldn’t stop laughing. A lady walked by pushing a stroller, and Jesse pointed his laser at her purse, and then I pretended to point at the baby, and then Jesse was laughing so hard he actually sat down on the floor. If we had been two kids doing that, we would have gotten yelled at, but when you’re a grown-up, I guess they leave you alone.

Eventually, we went to a computer station, where Jesse took off all the joke stuff, and we had a list of spatulas and bowls and picture frames that he liked and thought Dad would think was pretty normal, plus a waffle maker, an ice cream machine, and a two-hundred-dollar blender that Jesse said was probably a stretch, but what the heck.

Jesse said we must have done miles of walking at the store, and that we deserved some cake. We went to the department-store café, where he ordered two slices of carrot cake, which he knows I love. The slices were huge, so I cut mine in half and asked for a to-go box, for Angus. They gave it to me in a shiny pink bag with ribbon handles, and I loved holding it. The whole entire afternoon felt like a vacation from regular life. I didn’t even have to remind myself not to worry.

When Jesse dropped me off at Mom’s, I remembered to say thank you, and he gave me a big hug and said I was his favorite shopping partner. Then we were quiet for a second, and it was like a door opened and all my worries came zooming back: Angelica in the hospital, getting those tests. The invitation I had sent to Mission. Sonia in California, and how she still hadn’t emailed me and might never come back. Jesse couldn’t really be her dad from New York the same way my dad was for me. I didn’t want to say it even inside my own head, but I realized that I might know Sonia’s dad better than she did. It wasn’t fair. I don’t know what Jesse was thinking about.

Jesse

Those RSVP cards had been arriving in the mail. Almost everyone said they could come.