“Impulsive,” said Jude. “Charismatic, I guess. Angry. Reckless. Good at making things. Artistic, in a way. Kind of fatalistic, though.” She stared off into the distance, trying to separate the Liam she had known all those years ago from the one she had learned about in the last few days. “I suppose he was kind of a leader of the pack, if that makes sense. He was powerful.”

“He sounds a bit of an alpha male.” Dee swept the crushed biscuits into a bowl.

“Perhaps.”

“Don’t you find that a bit odd?”

“Odd in what way?”

“He doesn’t sound like your kind of person at all.”

“You’re right.” Jude laughed. “He isn’t. Wasn’t.”

“But you’ve got a look on your face when you talk about him.”

“I was only eighteen.”

“It’s like you never got over him.”

“That’s crap. I was in love with Nat. I never thought about Liam. Or hardly ever.”

“When he turned up, it triggered something in you and then he died. So you never had time to see he was just another man who was used to getting his own way with women.”

“He didn’t have his own way with me,” said Jude. “Nothing happened and nothing was going to happen, and I didn’t feel anything for him, except curiosity and gratitude.”

Dee cocked an eyebrow at her. “Gratitude?”

Jude started to explain and then stopped. She couldn’t, not just now, not just yet.

“Because he was important to me once.”

Dee poured the melted chocolate over the biscuits and dried fruit. “Now you’re getting all involved with his partner and his friends. That’s a bit weird, isn’t it?”

Jude considered this.

“It’s probably easier than sorting out my own life,” she said at last.

Dee nodded and Jude looked down at the hummus she was making, but she could still feel her friend’s eyes on her, scrutinizing, waiting.

“It’s a really strange household,” she said. “I mean, everyone in it is strange.”

“In what way?”

“It’s hard to describe. When I’m there, everything feels a bit glamorous and a bit menacing, and I never know if someone’s telling the truth or just, well, kind of acting things out, as if everything’s some kind of game. It doesn’t feel like there are proper . . .” She searched for the word. “Rules. Boundaries.”

“It sounds awful.”

“Everyone’s watching everyone else. Including me.”

“You mean they’re watching you or you’re watching them?”

“I don’t know. Both, maybe.”

“I don’t understand why you go back. They sound creepy.”

“They’re kind of amazing as well.”

Dee looked serious. “I don’t think you should go there anymore, Jude. I don’t think it’s healthy.”

Jude gave a laugh. “I’m going to go to the funeral at least. We’ve cooked all this food!”