Mickey gave a crooked smile, ‘Nah. He didn’t want to know me as a kid, so I figured he doesn’t have the right to know me now. I did alright without him, so what’s the point?’

I nodded, my skin buzzing from a combination of the liquor and the excitement of this human connection. It was the first conversation I’d had with someone since my life got turned upside down that felt completely raw and honest. I needed that. Looking at Mickey again I saw him in a new light. Under his scruffy exterior was a deep, caring guy, and I was glad I’d finally come in without Andie and discovered that about him.

‘Who knows, maybe you’re the smart one,’ I said, taking another sip. ‘I couldn’t resist trying to find out every detail about my bio-family and it’s landed me in this web of chaos, but I just can’t stop. I need to find my family and learn the truth about them.’

‘Well, you’re braver than me, Liz. It’s great you’re going after the answers you want. But if you ever need someone who understands how it feels for a parent not to want you, well, you know where to find me,’ he replied, smiling softly. My stomach did a little flip but I chalked it up to the whiskey.

‘I may just take you up on that,’ I said with a half-smile as Mickey got called away to make an old-fashioned for a guy at the other end of the bar. While I was still upset, the conversation had calmed me, had pulled me back from the ledge ever so slightly.

By the time I finished the third drink and rose to go back to the apartment, throwing some cash on the bar for Mickey and thanking him for the talk, I realized I was angry at Andie and my parents. But that was only part of it. More so, I was hurt at being left in the dark about my own life by so many people, intentional or not. The only thing that would make me feel better, I decided, was to know everything. To take back control. I needed to know more about the circumstances of my adoption, more about my mother, and most importantly, I needed to know who in my family was a suspected killer. There was only one way to get those answers. I hurried out of the bar into the warm evening air, embracing the buzz from the whiskey, taking oversized steps to cover the short amount of sidewalk back to our apartment. When I got to our building, I hurried down the hall, anxious to call Rosie and set up another family get-together.

VICTIMS 10 & 11

Madison Frank & Samantha Kozac

1999

CHAPTER 14