It was like she knew what had been going on. Of course, she didn’t. But I always felt there was this connection between us, like she could see right into my mind. I thought of Hekla then; she’d like that.

I took a deep breath, sweeping Lumin’s fringe from her eyes. ‘Actually, darling, you might get a chance to meet your daddy.’

She sat up straight. ‘What? Where is he?’

‘Scotland.’

‘Scotland? That’s ages away!’

‘Not too far.’

‘Am I going to meet him very soon?’

I felt tears fill my eyes. ‘I hope so, darling.’

Chapter Twenty

I woke the next morning, nerves a-pitter-patter in my tummy. I hadn’t seen Dylan for so long … and now I was just an hour away from seeing him again. I think Lumin sensed my apprehension. She watched me, brow creased, as I helped her get ready for school. I wasn’t sure when she would meet her father. She seemed ready. But first I needed to see Dylan, talk to him.

I dropped Lumin off at school, joining in half-heartedly with the school gate chitter-chatter. A couple of the mums had made me feel welcome. I was grateful for that but at that moment all I could think about was Dylan – I had no time for small talk. I walked back to the house. He said he’d arrive by 9.30. That gave me time to down some coffee, get myself together.

But as I drew closer, I could see he’d already arrived.

He was leaning against the brick wall outside my house, squinting up at the autumn sun. When I approached, he pushed away from the wall. His beard was shorter, more stubbled now, accentuating his distinctive cheekbones. His hair was coal black against the blue skies. He seemed to have lost weight. Still tall and muscled but leaner. And he looked tired. Even from where I was standing several metres away I could see it. Maybe the news he had a daughter had kept him up at night, as I too had been up all night.

I walked over to him, feeling like I might be sick right there on the pavement, I was so nervous. We regarded each other for a few moments, so much unsaid.

I was the first to speak. ‘I’m so sorry. Now I look back, I can’t really rationalise why I kept Lumin from you.’ I looked at him for a response but he just continued watching me, his hands dug deep in the pockets of his dark coat, the collar turned up. ‘I suppose it was a mixture of you saying you never wanted children,’ I continued, ‘plus how we parted. And after my parents …’ I was babbling, I knew that, but I needed to fill the oppressive silence.