‘Shall we get tea?’ I asked, giving her just as determined a look as I handed her umbrella back to her. I needed to take control of the situation.

She nodded. ‘Good idea.’

We walked in silence beneath the vast umbrella to the small café I sometimes went to with Tina. As we walked, I tried to gather my thoughts. I could lie to her, tell her there was another man not long after Dylan. But I knew she wouldn’t believe me. She’d seen what I saw every day in Lumin: those cheekbones, those lips, those long lean limbs.

The cafe was deserted when we got in. Mairi shook out her umbrella then leant it against the wall. She was wearing a long woollen coat the colour of coal. It looked expensive but I noticed there was a hole in the seam under her arm and her boots were scuffed.

‘What do you want to drink?’ I asked as I searched in my purse for some coins.

‘Don’t worry, I’ll get this,’ Mairi said, putting her hand on my arm and holding it. I realised I was shaking. ‘I think you better sit down before your legs give up on you.’

I nodded, took a seat by the window and stared out into the rain. In its reflection, I saw Mairi walk to the counter, the end of her plait dripping water onto the floor as she did so.

‘Tea? Coffee?’ she called over her shoulder.

‘Coffee.’ I put my head in my hands, the awfulness of what I’d done to Dylan and his family dawning on me. She must hate me.

She returned with two mugs and two almond croissants.

‘You look like you need some sugar in you,’ she said, looking me over. ‘You’ve lost weight.’

‘I’ve been busy.’

‘So it seems.’ She took a sip of her coffee then leant back in her chair, staring at me.

‘How did you find me?’ I asked.

‘Your photo was on one of Heather’s favourite documentary-making weblogs.’

I closed my eyes, pinching my nose.

‘A very nice photo too,’ she added. ‘Heather was very excited when she saw it … especially when she read you lived in Druridge Bay with your daughter.’

I shook my head. I should have been more careful.

‘I made some calls, spoke to a lovely man called Steve, explaining I was an old friend,’ Mairi continued. ‘He was kind enough to let me know your daughter had just started school. As soon as I realised her age, I knew she had to be Dylan’s.’

I hadn’t seen Steve all weekend. He was probably planning to tell me about the call when I got in later.

‘Does Dylan know?’ I asked, mouth going dry.