I should have realized straightaway that she had an ulterior motive. Should have guessed she’d never truly given up looking for the Molyneuxs. When she suggested the trip to Dovercourt, I’d assumed she just wanted to walk on the beach, but when we got there, she was more interested in the houses facing the sea than the sea itself. It wasn’t until we caught sight of Nigel Molyneux deadheading roses in a front garden that she finally came clean with me. Told me she’d been doing some sleuthing on the internet and that, voilà, her tenacity had finally paid off. Her face was jubilant.

I knew in that moment that it would all start up again, that it had never really stopped. And I knew, with a sinking sense of inevitability, that whatever she wanted me to do, I’d do it.

Like that first, dreadful dare.

But we were children then. This time, it was different.

35

I pat and smooth the pillows on the spare bed, hoping I won’t regret my generous impulse. Ross was a bit taken aback when I told him I’d offered Catherine our spare room. Almost angry. I know it was rash of me and that I should have spoken to him first, but after everything he’s said about me needing to move on from the past and how I ought to make more of an effort to be civil to her, I thought he’d be fine about it. In any case, it’s only for two weeks and it seems daft, her having to squeeze all her things into June’s one-bedroom flat and share a sofa with two long-haired cats, when we’re lucky enough to have this place all to ourselves.

I open the little wardrobe and count the hangers. I don’t expect Mum and Dad will be too pleased when I tell them. If I tell them. I haven’t made up my mind whether I will or not yet. It’ll be hard for them to understand how different Catherine is now. How much she’s changed. Besides, I’m still reeling from the revelation that not only did they used to know the Dawsons, they lived on the same estate, the same street. What else haven’t they told me?

I’ve always thought of my parents as allies, as friends. The two people who have my best interests at heart, whom I can turn to when I need help and support, or just want to talk things through. Maybe I feel this even more because of my epilepsy and the things we’ve gone through together. But the fact that they’ve lied to me all these years has changed how I feel about them. I still love them, of course I do, but something has shifted between us now.