I tried to tell myself that there had to be a natural explanation, but my teeth were chattering and I was trembling so much the bed was shaking. Then I had a somewhat comforting thought. If I had to desire him before he could come to me, then I was sure he would never come. But then after a long while I went to sleep, and in my dream I did desire him and once again he came to me.

15

Chapter Fifteen

In the morning I again told myself that we have no control over our dreams. I knew that subconscious minds can play tricks, distorting our true instincts and inclinations. Then I noticed the indentation on the other pillow and the way the covers were rumpled on the other side of the bed.

Maybe Jack had come upstairs, after all, or maybe I had rolled over on that side myself. But I never did that at night, or at least I never had until now. Then Franny must have come back during the night. But the door was locked now, although the key was on the floor. Could it have been slid under the door?

I put the whole thing out of my mind and had a quick soak in the tub. Then I dressed and rapped on Duff’s door and he answered immediately and cheerfully.

Indeed, we were a cheerful company at breakfast that morning. No mention was made of Stephanie’s death, or any other unpleasantness. Duff and Franny jabbered about their school activities (listening to Duff, one might have thought he was spending a lot of time at the high school) and even Jack was jolly telling us how good he had begun to feel and how well his work was going. He had decided to quit depending on his crutches and to try his luck with a cane. He gave us a demonstration after breakfast, and he really could get around better than I had expected.

“What do you think, old lady?” he asked. “Should we go back East now?”

“I thought you wanted to stay here.”

“It occurred to me maybe I ought to talk with some publishers about my book. I’m far enough along now to show them something.”

“On that yellow pad?”

“I’ll get a typist to work it up. Actually, maybe you could do it. You used to be a pretty fast gun on the old Underwood.”

“No, thanks. But you go to New York for a few days if you think you can manage all right. Duff and Franny and I can get along here.”

“I thought you wanted to leave.”

“I do, you idiot, but the kids are in school!”

“No problem,” said Franny. “I’ll be glad to go to school somewhere else.”

“We could probably find schools in Manhattan,” Jack said.

“Are you crazy? Decent ones would cost a fortune. And what about the danger to your children on the streets?”