I try to push down the irritation of having no control and just look out the window all the way to the airport. The other three are talking about their day and how it’s been a challenging few months for us all.

I want to contribute that as hard as it’s been for them, none of them have a threat hanging over their head like I do. I try to keep a lid on my emotions, but for some reason it is rising again, because I feel out of control.

Like he can sense my head is starting to race again, Forrest’s thumb starts stroking my thigh back and forth. There is something about this simple motion that seems to bring me some kind of peace.

Pulling up to the plane, I try to take a deep breath as I step out of the car. I need to stop being such a bitch to Forrest. After all, he is trying to do something nice for me, yet just like normal, my default mechanism is to put up the walls and push people away with my brashness.

Watching Felisha and Flynn hurry to the plane in front of me, I know I need to apologize to Forrest. And that’s when it hits me. Shit, my period is due any day, so no wonder I want to scratch everyone’s eyes out. Welcome, hormones, nice of you to join the party to bring out the crazy bitch in me.

“I’m sorry.” I mean it, but of course it still comes out a bit harshly.

“Thanks, but I don’t need the apology. I know I’m pushing you past your comfort zone. I was expecting it.” He takes my hand and pulls me toward the steps up into the jet.

What the hell was that supposed to mean? Since when should someone put up with backlash for doing something nice? I don’t think I have ever taken the time to stop and assess my own personality over the years. But maybe it’s time I did.

Forrest steps through the plane door and then turns in the entrance to direct me to walk past him.

The moment I step into the main part of the cabin, there is an eruption of cheers and clapping. I try to step backward to run away from whatever this is. My back hits Forrest’s chest, and he wraps his arms around my waist.

“Happy fortieth birthday, baby,” he says in my ear as I start taking in the vision in front of me, streamers and a big sign that’s hanging up.

“How… I wasn’t going to… Felisha, you are dead to me,” I snap, pointing at her.