‘Exactly. Didn’t you notice that all the doors opened inward. Those heavy, watertight doors are built to keep not only the water from coming up through the ship but for keeping the air inside too. The air keeps her afloat.’ He shook his head forlornly. ‘Now, some fool has opened some of the portholes and all is lost. Countless lives wasted because the ship that was destined to save them, is sinking.’ He crossed himself. ‘God have mercy on our poor boys. Most will die, not because of our enemy, Kaiser Bill, but because of some incompetent on board who can’t obey orders.’ He peered at the water. ‘If only HMHS Britannic could have stayed afloat long enough to reach land. She could have been repaired and returned to duty.’ He shook his head forlornly.

‘But, Father, those portholes are usually many feet above sea level, who would ever have imagined they’d end up on the waterline?’ I said.

‘That’s why we have a captain, miss. A man capable of foreseeing every scenario, who gives orders for that reason. Like God, he must be obeyed, without question, under every circumstance. If he gave orders for the portholes to remain closed, and somebody who knew of his order still opened them, that person alone is guilty of this catastrophe, and the massive loss of life that will follow the ship’s demise.’

It was me . . . me!

The horrible truth came home to haunt me for the rest of my life. I was responsible for the ship sinking. Me, showing off in front of six recuperating soldiers, had caused this great catastrophe. Now what would happen to the thousands of wounded soldiers, waiting for us to rescue them? I knew what would happen. They would die! All because of me and my stupid vanity!

Wave after wave of remorse ran through me, but remorse wouldn’t save lives. Nor would it ease the pain of the dying, or those who writhed in agony while they waited for a ship that would never arrive.

Our men rowed furiously. ‘Why don’t we head for the island, instead of going around it?’ I asked.

‘We’re trying, but the current is so strong in this channel, it’s pulling us past,’ the cook said.

‘What is that place, the island?’ I asked the priest.

‘I believe it’s the Greek island of Kea,’ he replied.

Another lifeboat full of uniformed staff rowed away from the Britannic. Their boat rocked violently as sudden turbulence burst through the calm sea. The oarsmen heaved away, and I sensed their urgency. The Britannic was so low in the water now, I wondered how she was still afloat. The ship’s bell clattered musically from the crow’s nest, breaking a moment of unnatural silence, then two long blasts of the whistle sounded above the clamour. I remembered the drill, it meant abandon ship immediately. A final lifeboat pushed away.