When they’d left the room, I asked nurse, ‘What did he mean about the Foxhound?’

‘That’s the name of the ship commissioned to take us all away, back to Piraeus, the port of Athens, I think, though nobody’s very sure. Anyway, they’re all hoping to leave this afternoon.’

‘What? You mean they might not let me go on board! I’ll be stuck here?’ My heart plummeted.

‘He’s afraid you and Perkins might spread the influenza. He’s quarantined you with the Corporal and left me in charge.’

‘But that’s not fair!’

She nodded, her mouth a tight line. ‘You’re right, but there’s nothing I can do.’

Then I thought perhaps it was justice. After what I’d caused, I’d probably get pneumonia and die like half of those who caught the dreaded illness, and that would be the end of it. Poor Perkins. Sooner or later he’d realise what had caused the Britannic to sink, and he’d hate me enough to tell the authorities. My parents would be ashamed.

Perhaps Perkins would develop pneumonia and die, then nobody would know the truth. I stared across at the next bed. How could I think such a thing! The poor man had lost his foot and been in absolute agony. It wasn’t something that could be undone. Then again, if he hadn’t bullied me . . . but that was no excuse for me breaking orders!

Such terrible thoughts . . . what was I turning into? Had these monsters and demons always been inside me, waiting like dragon’s teeth to spring into life?

Tears gathered in the corners of my eyes and trickled into my hair. Everything was so awful, so unforgivable. If only Sissy had lived, none of this would have happened. Why was I saved – for my parents’ sake? A miracle, the priest said, but I knew the truth. It was so I could live out my punishment.

‘Nurse Gertie, why are you crying? What’s wrong?’ Perkins asked. Even though his words were drowsy from medication, there was concern in his voice.

I glanced across at him, lying on his back, eyes closed. He was usually a confident man, a decision maker, a man who cared. Good-looking with a square jaw and straight nose. As I studied him, a warm feeling gathered inside me. I was so glad he didn’t suffer the terrible fate of his fellow passengers in Lifeboat 1. I sniffed. ‘Nothing, really, I’m just being silly. How do you feel, Corporal?’

‘Good, a little lightheaded, muzzy, but no pain.’ He reached across the gap. ‘Will you hold my hand for a moment, nurse?’