‘I was embarrassed. I said the first thing that came into my head!’

‘Obviously.’

‘And today has been so bad: Ed won’t look at me, people who were on the trip won’t stop looking at me, and Bella’s just had this smile on her face …’ I trail off because Annie’s eyes have gone wide.

‘You don’t think …’ she says.

‘What?’

‘You don’t think that Bella could have been serious? Maybe Ed really was going to ask you to the dance. Maybe your whole nerd-look gives Ed the hots!’

‘What? No!’ I shake my head.

‘Go to the dance with him! I’m going. We could hang out together and embarrass boys by asking them to dance.’

‘Annie, Ed didn’t ask me to the dance: it was just a joke of Bella’s! I’ve been sitting next to Ed King in lessons for nearly four years and he only speaks to me if he’s got something sarcastic or competitive to say.’

‘Boys are weird, Meg. One way you know for certain that they like you is if they throw something at you. Has he ever done that?’

I think for a moment. ‘Never.’

‘Well, does he look at you? You know, like this …’ Annie opens her eyes wide, tilts her head to one side and gazes at me.

I can’t help laughing. ‘Ed only ever looks at me if he has to, like if he needs to borrow a pen.’

She narrows her eyes. ‘How often does he do that?’

‘I don’t know, a few times a week?’

‘Oh my God!’ Annie grabs my arm and squeezes her green nails into my flesh. ‘Ed doesn’t need pens. He’s like you, a stationery perv.’

‘What? How do you know that?’

‘Because I watch people, Meg, and I see everything.’ She lowers her voice. ‘Rose, for example, only wears make-up on the days that we have Biscuit Club – read into that what you will – and Ed King has two pencil cases: the typical scuzzy boy one he gets out in lessons, with a ruler and a broken pen in it, and a backup that he keeps in his bag that is literally bulging with writing implements!’

‘So you’re saying that every time Ed asks me if he can borrow a pen …’

‘He’s using it as an excuse to melt into your super-clever eyes and check out your geek-rack!’

I cross my arms. ‘No way. I don’t have a geek-rack. I don’t have any type of rack!’

‘We’ve all got racks, Meg.’

Just as I’m about to tell her to shut up, my phone starts to vibrate. Mr Curtis is still out of the room so I take it out of my pocket. It’s a message from Little Acorns: Elsa is running a temperature and her nappies are nasty. I’ve tried to ring home, but your mum’s not answering and her mobile’s switched off. Please can you or your grandad come and collect Elsa asap. Thanks!

‘What’s the matter?’ says Annie.