The first time I heard footsteps approaching the basement door, I held my breath and prayed that I could wrap my arms around my mother again in those celestial gardens. But the footsteps retreated and left behind a deepening silence, one that summoned the soft echoes of my father’s voice.

That look in your eye when you know you are right, you remind me so very much of the legendary Malalai and her battle cries. Half-dead men defeated the British because of her. Afghanistan’s secret weapon has always been her women.

But, Boba, I’m just a girl.

What a thing to say! As if a girl is made of lesser materials. Have you forgotten the words of Rumi? You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.

I had never truly given myself over to those words until this moment.

The thought of the ocean inside me, with its infinite drops, ran through me like a charge. My existence was integral to the universe.

What was Malalai’s battle cry, Boba? I asked the silence. My father’s voice replied.

Young loves, give your youth to this battle and be proud

Or by God you’ll live with shame as your shroud!

I hurt to think of the afternoon when Boba had brought me to this space, wanting to show me the treasures of a lost world. I crept deeper into the alcove, wanting to touch the crates he’d touched again. I wished Neelab could be here with me now, so we could at least hold on to each other. My fingers trembling, I opened the latch just as Boba had done. I ducked into the black hole and pulled the secret door closed behind me.

It had occurred to me at some point in the last few hours that the absence of gunshots might not mean the killing had ceased—it could mean that there was no one left to kill. I was devastated. I was also furious at Shair. Had he fired the shots that killed my family? That he had saved me by bringing me down here did nothing to dampen my rage.

The three knobs of the safe pressed into my spine. I pushed back in frustration. I thought of Ai-Khanoum, where a whole civilization disappeared beneath the ground.

No, I told myself. I will not let these people disappear me.

My fingers curled around the flashlight Shair had thrown to me. I clicked it on and pressed the light against the palm of my hand, making it glow pink. I turned to face the safe and shone the light on the dials.

I had seen the combination, hadn’t I?

The dials felt heavy. I twirled the one on the left first, slowly. I stared at the numbers, willing the combination to rise from the ashes. I twirled again and closed my eyes.