I swiped at my eyes. “Not sure I’m in the place to start swapping relationship advice with my best friend’s boyfriend,” I said, trying to make a joke.

He ducked his head, running his hand through his hair. “I was always your friend before I was anything else,” he said. “I’d … I’d like to be that again. If you’d let me.”

My breath was deep, steadying. “I’d like that.”

He looked up at me, the barest glimmer of a smile on his face. “All right.” He glanced away and then back at me. “I should go. You have people coming.” He retraced his steps to the front door.

He was halfway out when I blurted out, “Wait. Chad.”

He stopped.

“You never told me why you came here in the first place.”

“I wanted to tell you I was sorry,” he said.

“You’ve already apologized.”

“For fucking everything up, sure. But not to you, for what I did. I shouldn’t have kissed you, Babe. Maybe there’s always been a little of what-could-have-been between you and me.” He paused. “I love you, but I’m in love with Penny.”

I nodded. I knew that. No matter how close Penny drew me into their relationship, I’d always known I didn’t want to get between them. “Chad … I know I said we weren’t really at the swapping advice phase, but can I give you some anyway?”

“Sure.”

“I know you love Penny, but if you’re just with her because, I don’t know, you’re scared to be alone? You shouldn’t be.”

His grin turned crooked. “You can’t just tell someone how to feel.”

“Right. Sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.” I shook my head. “You can totally be scared. But you shouldn’t let it hold you back from doing what’s right for you. She broke up with you and didn’t even tell you why.”

“What are you getting at?”

“Think about it. What’s changed? What’s less same-y now?”

He didn’t have an answer.

“She’s scared to be the same, and you’re scared to be different,” I said. “Shouldn’t that be sort of a concern?”

“I don’t know, a little?” He shuffled his feet. “But it’s about to be the end of everything, Babe. It’s fucking terrifying. We’re legally adults, but I don’t feel like one. Not in any of the ways that matter.”

I wrapped my arms around myself. We should have talked about this weeks ago. I should have told him I was scared, too.