They sit me down and they kind of hoosh Ronnie away like hoosh hoosh back to his own table.

Eiger says: “Jack?”

I say: “Man I have no idea what that was about. That guy thinks he knows me.”

Eiger says: “And he is wrong.”

“Of course he is.”

“I think it would be best if you left now Herr Price.”

“Price, what Price? I am Telemark. Man I have just no idea who this Price guy—wait is that the guy you totally shot in the face?”

“Your speculations are unwelcome Mr.—”

“Banjo—”

“As you say.”

I say: “So man I feel like I have upset your equilibrium man but Hans—baby—I really want to rob your bank call me it will be great.”

And I go back and I eat my lunch and then I pay and I leave.

I pay for Hans Eiger’s lunch too which is a nice gesture and also too it means he won’t find out for another few hours that someone has broken into his day-to-day bank account and stolen thirty-one thousand francs and his bank are saying it is all his fault for setting his password to P4SSW0Rd.

If that was actually his password that would entirely be his fault that is a shitty password.

His password was some crawling alphanumeric horror no sane human being could remember but once Charlie has your bank’s dongle and an idea how the whole thing works that is not really much help.

—

Hans Eiger will check out Ronnie Flamingo and he will find out that there really was such a guy and that he knew Jack Price. But then he will also find out that Jack Price was not then known as Jack Price and then he will find out that Ronnie Flamingo died in Gozo in ’06 before Jack ever went by Jack.

I do not know what the fuck a dazzling urbanite like Ronnie Flamingo was doing in Gozo I am guessing it is not a good story.

Gozo is the island next door to Malta which is where Banjo Telemark is from.

The guy who just got Frida Kahlo’d is an actor I flew in who now includes on his résumé the information that he worked four years ago on a live project by the famous Ambiguitionist artist Banjo Govinder Telemark.

Eiger will find all of this out.

And it will drive him batshit.

It is totally ambiguous. Banjo Telemark is an actual prankster. A known international bullshit merchant who specializes in fucking with you in the name of art and that is precisely the kind of art Hans Eiger particularly hates. Art should be painted on canvas and have ballet dancers or squares of red and yellow and blue that is just what is right.