“I used to think I was touched by the Goddess,” I say. “She has a special place for healers. We’re not priests exactly, but we’re in her service nonetheless.” A wind blows, and the incense sticks flare brighter for a moment. One blows out. “I was a very good healer. My teachers always said I would save many lives.”

“But now you’re rosemarked,” says Mehtap. “And you don’t know why your Goddess has let this happen, if you were one of her chosen.” I can tell by the way she speaks that she’s asked similar questions. We all wonder the same things. Of course we must.

“Perhaps the Goddess’s plan will become more clear with time,” I say. Or perhaps I wasn’t chosen at all. Perhaps the Goddess doesn’t care.

In the distance, somewhere at the other side of the compound, people are shouting. It’s a fight, or a celebration, or both. Just another of the senseless things that happen in this compound.

I wonder if the people out there have made their peace with the gods. I wonder if the healing priestesses of Hefana feel betrayed, as I did, when they fall ill. The Amparan gods don’t seem to be very concerned with mere mortals. From the tales I hear, they’re often preoccupied with their own divine politics. With the Goddess though, it’s different. We’re taught that her spirit permeates the world, that she’s everywhere, and always watching. Which makes it all the more perplexing when she turns away.

After a while, the shouting dies down, and Mehtap and I are once again alone with the gods. For a brief moment I think about what the afterlife might be like. Will Mehtap and I end up in the same place? Will it be quiet, like now, or will it be crowded with the cries of those who went before us? The questions send a shiver over my skin, and I shrink away from them.

Mehtap shifts her weight and then reaches out to take my hand. “Perhaps it’s selfish of me,” she says, “but I’m glad your Goddess sent you here.”

As Mehtap waits for her father to return, she throws herself into her quest to remake the rosemarked compound. Once again, she surprises me with her intelligence and drive. She listens as Jesmin and I discuss how to keep the rose plague from spreading and compiles a list of ways the rosemarked could stay in contact with their healthy relatives. She asks questions about how the newly rosemarked are brought into the compound. When I tell her about the boy who nearly fell into Anahi’s hands, Mehtap insists on visiting Estir’s people by the east wall. She tours their houses, exclaims over the apprenticeships they’ve set up to share skills, buys jewelry from their makeshift marketplace, and promises to send them what supplies she can.