“I mean, if he’d gone out and bought a Harley, it would’ve been a lot easier to contend with. Or if he’d taken up rock climbing, you know?”

“Of course! The strangest part of this, and it’s all pretty strange, is that he doesn’t seem to understand why it’s a problem for you. Like, why can’t you just take him as he is?”

“Exactly. Although he has got to know that this is asking a lot. It’s not like he wants to dress up in private, which might be easier for me to adjust to.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“Not at all. I mean, I’ve known him since his family moved here. He was a little femme, but that never bothered me. Now, suddenly, he’s a female impersonator out there in the world? I don’t understand.”

“Maybe because it got dumped on you all at once it’s harder to take.”

“No kidding! Do you think we might have discussed this bit by bit to give me a chance to get my brain around it?”

“Seems to me that might have been a better choice.”

“He wants to flaunt it all over the place. I’m asking you, who comes to Sullivan’s Island in full drag and crashes a wedding?”

“Is it drag? I thought drag was half of the term drag queen. And drag queens are gay, I think.”

“Charlie’s not gay. I’m certain of that. But back to my question. Who shows up like that on Sullivan’s Island and crashes a wedding?”

“No one that I ever knew. At least, to the best of my limited knowledge.”

“What a night,” she said again. “Maybe that was just a huge lapse in judgment.”

Morning came quickly. I had a little headache from all the wine and champagne I’d consumed at the wedding and afterward, when Leslie and I, incredulous to the tenth power, sat together trying to dissect the brains of Charlie and Archie. I went into the kitchen thinking coffee would clear the cobwebs and a piece of toast might soak up the poison and bring me back to life. Momma was seated at the table reading the paper. The coffee was already made.

“Oh, g’morning! Is Leslie up?” I said.

“No, she’s still sleeping. At least she’s alone.”

I just shook my head and reached inside the refrigerator for the milk.

“I’m going over to the boys in a little bit. Do you need me to do anything for you before I go?”

“No, I’m fine. You sister can help me if and when she decides to rise.”

“Did you bring in the paper?”

“I’m not dead yet, you know. I can still go outside and get the paper if I want to.”