Because of the crazy amount of time we spent on the phone, a lot of those phone calls included her reading passages that she had just written. She sat at her computer every day for a very focused four hours. She had a process, she had a method, which is how she was able to write a book a year and still be a fantastic mother and wife and friend. Sometimes we would argue about some of the characters’ choices, and sometimes I would find parts of a conversation we had right there in the lines of her book. She stole some of my jokes. There is probably an argument she gave the jokes to me in the first place.

She taught me the power of love and family. She and my father shared a wonderful marriage and partnership. Even in her last days at the hospital, she would come out of a sleep to make sure that she could smooch my dad when he entered the room. Her family, which wasn’t all biological and often chosen, was and still are very close. Our family doctor and his wife, her Realtor and his wife, some of her childhood friends, all have places on our family tree. Her nephews and their wives, who were the inspiration for Queen Bee, have become more like my big brothers and sisters. She and my husband, Carmine, were almost as close as we were! They spoke on the phone often, and he would always defer to her for advice. I think when she passed, his heart broke into a million pieces. She was so good at being there for someone. So generous in every single way, but mostly her heart.

The biggest lesson, though, that I will always carry with me is to strive to be the best version of myself every day. My mom was a rule breaker and unafraid of anyone else’s opinion. She was not a pleaser and never let anyone bulldoze her. She was confident in her own strengths but was also never shy from saying “I don’t know.” Teddy would run into her arms and snuggle her like she was me, and she taught him tons of songs, read books, and tickled him until he almost passed out from giggles. . . . However, she babysat once, and the diaper was put on backwards. She had her flaws. She stepped up, she worked hard, she loved harder, and along the way she made you laugh.

We all miss her and will miss her writing, but thankfully she has twenty novels, and a children’s book coming out (cowritten with me) that we can open and read when we miss her voice. Take the lessons that she taught me for yourselves. Work hard, love hard, be generous, be thoughtful, be brave, and know the value of sharing a great story, especially if it makes you laugh.

Warmly,

Victoria Hanna Frank

Remembering the Grit and Glamour of Dorothea Benton Frank