“And my pain was nothing compared to having a major joint shattered. He held on until he passed out standing up. One of the medics had to catch him. It’s amazing he was on his feet at all.” He took a sip of coffee before going on. “Too bad he couldn’t come back. They lost two good cops that night.”

“You must be talking about Adam.” Hayley’s voice came from behind her. She patted Amanda on the arm as she passed, Cutter at her heels. The dog nudged Amanda’s hand as if reassuring himself she was all right. Then, oddly, he sat at her feet, as if he’d sensed her inner turmoil.

Hayley reached for the coffee Quinn had prepared, giving him a loving look as she did so. “It’s still sad, him having his lifelong dream taken away.”

Amanda knew she was still staring, but that nausea was expanding. “Taken away?”

Hayley gave her the same sort of puzzled look Quinn had. It was Quinn who answered her. “I’m sure they didn’t want to retire him, but not much choice with his arm in that condition.”

Amanda set down her mug rather sharply. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words would come. She felt as if the ground under her feet had shifted, or worse, turned to slipping, sliding sand. Cutter whined, and the worried sound was the impetus for her to move.

She whirled and ran back to the guest room, where she sank down on the edge of the bed, shaking. The dog had followed her and leaned against her. She felt the warm comfort, but this time it wasn’t quite enough.

For five years she had hated Adam Kirk. For not doing what he should have when her father had been shot. And for quitting.

He hadn’t just been shot in the arm, some flesh wound as she’d always thought. The very thing the function of that arm hinged—literally—on was destroyed.

He hadn’t been physically able to do what she thought he should have.

And he hadn’t quit, he’d been forced out, medically retired. Unable to come back even if he had wanted to.

Everything she had thought about him for the last five years was wrong.

He’s a good man. I trust him completely.

Amanda lowered her face into her hands, right now hating herself more than she had ever hated Adam Kirk.

Chapter 15

“We’re a little shorthanded right now,” Quinn said. “Liam’s the only one here. Teague won’t be back until nearly Christmas.”