I hoped that being honest with him might help him understand. “I just didn’t want to be caught. They were so close, and if SpaceTech had me, they would’ve given me nanos only to torture me again. I’d had enough of that. And maybe I could’ve held on until my father bargained for me, but maybe not. In the meantime, you would’ve been caught, along with Declan and Audrey and everyone else. That couldn’t happen. So I chose the lesser evil. I wasn’t sure I would die, but I wasn’t really sure I’d live either.”

“Okay,” he said the word, and I knew that he didn’t mean it. His voice was too cold and flat and his face… I wasn’t sure how he could keep it so blank.

The hope that he would understand and forgive me died. “What happened?”

I wouldn’t have known that whatever he was going to say was upsetting to him if I hadn’t noticed the short breath he took and the swallow, as if he was pushing down his emotions to keep his calm mask over his face.

“You stopped breathing in my arms as I was running with you to your father’s ship. The doctor was there at the door waiting for us. He kept you from dying until we got you into their healing chamber. You’ve been out for a week. At first, they thought you might be a vegetable, but—”

“But I’m okay.” I was speaking clearly, and even if I hadn’t stood up yet, I could wiggle my toes. I knew all I had to do was try to stand and I would.

“Yes. Physically, you’re fine. You’ll be a little weak at first, but you’ll get that back with a little work. Exercise should help everything get a little clearer for you.”

He barely knew me, but he could see through me. When I woke up, I’d needed that. I’d needed his help. But now, I wasn’t sure I liked being transparent at all. “How did you know?”

He raised an eyebrow. “How did I know what?”

“What I meant when I woke up? To send everyone away? How did you know? You were going to leave, but you stopped…” I should’ve been embarrassed asking him that, but I didn’t care. I wanted to know.

“I wasn’t leaving.” He was quiet for a long minute. We just sat there staring at each other as I waited for him to answer. Finally, he shook his head. “Ask me again when you’re not feeling so raw. Until then, let’s just say I have excellent gut instincts, especially when it comes to you.”

“Is that an Aunare thing?” Because the click I felt with some people could be called a gut instinct.