For a second, I was relieved. No matter how hard I’d tried to do the right thing, it seemed that I always lost. Maybe quitting wasn’t so bad. Maybe having this be done and finished meant that I could rest.

No more hiding. No more waitressing. No more wondering whether today was the day I was going to be discovered as a halfer. No more Jason Murtagh or SpaceTech using me to destroy the Aunare. It all sounded so perfectly lovely.

But then I realized if I were dead, my limbs probably wouldn’t hurt anymore. And the rock jabbing my back wouldn’t exist.

So I wasn’t dead. At least not yet.

That realization was a little disappointing. Because if I wasn’t dead, then all I had was more suffering ahead of me.

So I lay there and waited for my hearing and vision to come back. Wondering if they would come back. And if not, what was I going to do next?

Chapter Thirty-Six

I don’t know how long I was on the ground, but after a while I blinked my eyes, and I could see light and shadows. It took a few more minutes for my sight to fully come back, but everything was still silent. I couldn’t even hear myself breathe.

I rolled onto my side, rubbing my spine, trying to ease the ache away. The rock I fell on definitely left a bruise.

I finally decided to say something. Declan was too far away to help, but he was probably worrying. “I think I’m deaf.” I couldn’t hear my own words. My heart was racing, but I couldn’t hear the whooshing it sometimes made in my ears, especially when I was scared. And right now, I should’ve been hearing the whooshing. Loudly. Which made the silence that much scarier.

I massaged along my jaw, trying to get my ears to pop, but they wouldn’t. “Shit.” What was I supposed to do now?

And then there was an excruciating pop in my ears, and I screamed. I reached up and felt liquid running down my lobes and onto my neck. I pulled the tiny earbud out, and my fingers came back red.

It was only then that I realized I could hear Carl, Ahiga, and the rest of the control room yelling at me through the wrist unit. I’d bet money if I put in the earbud, Declan would be, too.

I couldn’t understand what they were saying. Their voices were too loud and on top of each other.

I put my hands over my ears. “Stop!” That got everyone to shut up. “Let’s mark that one as hot, shall we?” My words were sassy, but my voice was so weak and barely there.