Back Never Look Back
Chapters (51)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. One
  4. Two
  5. Three
  6. Four
  7. Five
  8. Six
  9. Seven
  10. Eight
  11. Nine
  12. Ten
  13. Eleven
  14. Twelve
  15. Thirteen
  16. Fourteen
  17. Fifteen
  18. Sixteen
  19. Seventeen
  20. Eighteen
  21. Nineteen
  22. Twenty
  23. Twenty-One
  24. Twenty-Two
  25. Twenty-Three
  26. Twenty-Four
  27. Twenty-Five
  28. Twenty-Six
  29. Twenty-Seven
  30. Twenty-Eight
  31. Twenty-Nine
  32. Thirty
  33. Thirty-One
  34. Thirty-Two
  35. Thirty-Three
  36. Thirty-Four
  37. Thirty-Five
  38. Thirty-Six
  39. Thirty-Seven
  40. Thirty-Eight
  41. Thirty-Nine
  42. Forty
  43. Forty-One
  44. Forty-Two
  45. Forty-Three
  46. Acknowledgments
  47. P.S. Insights, Interviews & More . . .*
  48. About the Author
  49. About the Book
  50. Also by Alison Gaylin
  51. About the Publisher

As Quentin slipped the pages out of the box, a feeling swept through him—a chill that pressed all the way to the bones, followed by a tightness in the muscles—a faint, simmering rage. Her handwriting on the page. This girl, who had watched her boyfriend kill a child, who had most likely killed many times herself. This murderer, who dotted her i’s with little circles. Her handwriting. She wrote this . . . He was aware of the silence in the room, his voice recorder capturing it, but he couldn’t get himself to speak.

“Can you read it?” Edith said. “I know it’s quite faint . . .”

He looked up at her—the big eyes behind the glasses, watching him, expectant. He cleared his throat. Read. “Before the 19th Amendment came to be in 1920, women didn’t have the right to vote. But because of the suffragettes like Susan B. Anthony and—”

“No, no. Read what she wrote at the bottom of that page.”

Quentin coughed. The dust was getting to him, but something else was getting to him too. A special one . . . He wondered if Mrs. Brixton kept boxes for Brian Griggs and Carrie Masters—Cooper and LeRoy’s fifth and sixth victims, found in their prom clothes, handcuffed together, shot in the head. Seniors at Santa Rosa High, not St. Xavier. Most likely victims of Cooper, not LeRoy. A murderer. The girl who ruined his mother’s life. Her handwriting on the page.

“Go on,” Edith said.

He took a breath. Keep it together. “The efforts of these brave women allowed for us all to be free,” he read. “But I don’t feel free, Mrs. Brixton, do you? When I am of legal voting age, like you, will I feel free, and equal and strong?” He read the next sentence, looked up at Edith Brixton and recited it out loud. “Is that a reason for me to look forward to growing up?”

Edith removed her glasses and rubbed her eyes. “She was one of those kids,” she said. “Always looking out the window, daydreaming. Her body would be in the room, but her mind would be a million miles away.”

“Did she talk to you directly in all her school essays?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“I’m not sure exactly,” Edith said. “But she’d lost her mother just a year earlier, and most of the other teachers at that time were younger women. Or men.”

“You think she was looking for a replacement.”

She put her glasses back on. “Something like that. I asked her to stay after class once, and we discussed the questions she’d written to me. It became a sort of tradition. April staying after class, talking with me about the future.”