“Not never.” He raised his eyebrows skeptically. “I would sometimes sort of…hump your leg and surprise myself with an orgasm. A stealth-gasm.” She was trying to lighten the mood, but it wasn’t working. She could tell he was going to object some more, so she shoved him off her, rolled him onto his back, and straddled him. “We were children. Neither of us know what we were doing. But look at us now.”

There. She’d cracked him. He rolled his eyes, but she could see the beginnings of a smile. So she hammed it up, gesturing at her naked chest. “I mean, really. We are winning at this friends-with-benefits thing. I’m topless and writhing all over you in semipublic.” She writhed to make the statement true, squirming around until she was lined up with his erection. “I had an orgasm without even using any of those condoms.” That got her the full smile. “That’s what life is, right? Or what it should be, anyway. We learn things. We get better.”

His arm floated up and made contact with her cheek. “I—” He swallowed whatever he’d been going to say. For a second she thought his eyes had gotten teary, but it must have been the harsh fluorescent lighting making them look shiny, because when he said, “Maybe we should use one of those condoms?” his voice had gone all low and sexy.

It was her turn to smile. “We wouldn’t want them to expire.”

“Two boxes of expired condoms would probably be a greater blow to my manhood than finding out that the only orgasms my teenage girlfriend ever had in my presence were accidental.”

“So maybe we should stop talking.”

“About this, anyway.” He swatted her butt playfully. “Take this off, Ariel.”

She laughingly started squirming out of it. “So this is like the porno version of The Little Mermaid? What would Walt say?”

“Yeah.” His eyes were riveted to her hands as she slid the bottoms over her hips. “Except you know how in the movie all the sea creatures are singing to the prince and telling him to kiss the girl?”

She nodded. “I seem to remember that. As established, I have seen the movie once or twice.”

“Right, but in this version, he’s going to fuck the girl.”

God damn. Sawyer loved how much Evie loved it when he talked dirty. All that time he had spent not talking dirty to Evie almost seemed like as much of a crime as all those missed orgasms.