Like you, I was at April’s disco. Not DJing, of course. No chance. I was there because I was press-ganged by Calloway to help supervise. Even that scared the shit out of me, you know? Probably more than the DJ gig scared you. Crazy.

You’ve come a long way, you really have.

I’d have dodged the job if it hadn’t been for April being there. I mean, I couldn’t hold a conversation with her, let alone do the things you do. But it was a chance to see her, imagine how her skin feels, how her hair might smell.

You’re so much less weird than you once were.

I visited Nain in the morning, like you. But, unlike you, I begged her to get well.

I visited Danny in the hospital too, no longer critical, but a long way from a full recovery from the stab wounds he sustained that night at the bowling alley. Life-changing – that’s how they talked about Danny’s injuries.

And when I turned up at school, a portrait of Alfie Lim stared back at me. Beneath it, flowers shivered in the icy breeze. A new poster boy for the Talk About It campaign, the subject of cautionary assemblies. Such a promising young man – dead by his own hand. I wasn’t close to Alfie like you’ve become, but I missed his classroom antics all the same. I ached at the sight of that empty chair in photography.

This disco wasn’t as good. April was right – your set really did make the night.

I didn’t even say goodnight to her when I left. Didn’t compliment her on her great job. Wanted to. Couldn’t.

I waited up the road for the number 83. It was even later than it usually is. With six inches of snow on the ground and no salt on the road, the bus skidded along the kerb before it stopped.

It was packed out, that bus. Near on a hundred kids piled on in their rave get-up, all neon T-shirts and fading glow sticks. The windows were steamed up in seconds. I managed to get a seat next to some old boozer with a nicotine-stained beard. He had a hacking cough and he smelt of dishcloths.

It took ages to get through Ebbswick – there were cars stranded in the snow all over the place. Took more than half an hour to get near the seafront. I thought about getting out and walking, but it would’ve meant asking all those noisy kids in the aisle to move. So I didn’t.

That’s the sort of thing you used to be scared of. Why?