Back Man Down Save as PDF
Chapters (60)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Other books by James Goodhand
  4. Dedication
  5. Four’s a Crowd
  6. That Friday Feeling
  7. Work
  8. Customer Service
  9. Starting Over
  10. Sweet Seventeen
  11. Burn, Baby, Burn
  12. A Turn
  13. Go-Between
  14. Joyride
  15. In
  16. Not a Date
  17. Taken Down
  18. Killing Time
  19. Reality
  20. The Long Wait
  21. The Other Side
  22. Dropping In
  23. In the Dark
  24. Blind Alley
  25. Showtime
  26. Straight Through
  27. What Develops
  28. Last Lesson
  29. House of Horrors
  30. Room with a View
  31. Party’s Over
  32. At Sea
  33. Fireworks
  34. The Turning of Tables
  35. Home Time
  36. Our Little Chats
  37. Out of the Blue?
  38. No Capes
  39. Holding On
  40. Salvage
  41. The End
  42. On a Promise
  43. Disco Inferno
  44. Lockdown
  45. Will Parks’ Big Moment
  46. The Calm
  47. Last Request
  48. The Storm
  49. All Change
  50. A Narrow Escape
  51. An Inconvenient Delay
  52. No More Fighting
  53. Level Crossing
  54. The Beginning
  55. Acknowledgements
  56. Resources
  57. Read more
  58. Read more
  59. 5.11 a.m.
  60. THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING

The sea swells softly beneath them, the rise and fall making it seem as though they are resting on the chest of an enormous sleeping beast. The stars that seemed so faint burn brightly now, increasing exponentially in number as layer after layer reveals itself. At first, like dusty spores on the black atmosphere, they ignite and sparkle like fireworks. Is the sky coming closer to him, Will wonders, or is he rising to meet it? He supposes that it hardly matters, Newton’s third law making a guest appearance in his scrambled mind to remind him that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. If he’s moving, then so is the sky.

‘I’m so baked, Parks,’ Alfie mumbles. ‘Baked to buggery.’

He’s on the opposite side of the boat but Will is sure he can see Alfie’s face close up to his as he says the words, reminding him of those times when he dozes in front of the telly but can still see the show in his head, matching up with the sound.

Shards of colour spear through the black night, purples and blues and emerald green. It puts Will in mind of that glass picture Nain made him for his birthday. The thought elicits a pang of worry, a concern reaching in from the ordinary world. But he knows she’s OK. He doesn’t know how he knows, but he’s certain: Nain is safe tonight.

The filing system inside Will’s head continues its disintegration. No longer is there a grid in which knowledge and memory and ideas are kept regimented. Instead they tumble and dance and make new friends with each other. Will has the sense of his mind needing to escape from a prison that he never knew existed. It seems so obvious now, how his brain is sealed inside his head – dark, quiet, protected. Caged. Fed only through tiny wires that connect to remote ears and eyes and nostrils. But his brain seems to be breaking free right now. It is out there, exposed to everything – unreduced, unfiltered.

‘What was that?’ Will asks.

‘Baked,’ Alfie says. ‘I was commenting on how motherfucking stoned I am.’

‘Not that. After that.’

‘Didn’t say a word.’

‘You didn’t, did you?’ And Will knows it’s true.

Did he hear anything? Maybe not. But he was aware of something. He is aware of something.

Of someone.

‘Say something?’ Will asks, although he’s not sure any sound actually leaves his mouth.

There’s something. It’s distant, yet it’s right in front of him at the same time.

‘Who are you?’ Will asks. He’s not seeing with his eyes. Nor is he listening with his ears. But it’s coming to him.

Faintly, barely perceptibly, a connection is made.

‘Tell me who you are,’ Will says.

We’ve come together at last. How I’ve longed for this moment.