I knew exactly what video she was talking about: me on my knees at Manson’s feet, during the drink or dare game we’d played almost three years ago. I’d kissed his boots in front of everyone. I’d soaked in the humiliation like the first hit of a drug and I hadn’t been able to shake my addiction to it since.

Bizarrely, I didn’t even feel angry. This entire situation was ridiculous, with grown adults giving me a hard time for who I chose to form a relationship with. They were trying so hard to cling to this faux dichotomy, determined that there had to be a hard division between “us” and “them.”

“You can put on the video,” I said, draining my cup and tossing it in the trash. “Go ahead, stream it to the TV if you’d like. I think it’s a classic at this point, but in case anyone doesn’t know…” I raised my voice a bit, so everyone could hear me. “It’s the video of me kissing Manson’s boots at Daniel’s Halloween party. We gave each other some wild dares that night, but do you know what’s even wilder, Danielle?”

She looked like she wanted to hit me.

“It’s wild that you think I care what you think of me,” I said. I felt such a profound sense of relief once the words were out, I almost laughed. I had cared; I’d cared so much that it hurt, that it almost broke me. But not anymore. That paralyzing fear was gone.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, likely the signal from the boys that they were almost ready to bail. Looking at the crowd gathered around us, I said, “Look at all of you! The moment I stepped inside, all your attention was on me. Me, Danielle. I don’t think the world revolves around me. No, I know it doesn’t. But I think you, and all of you other pathetic petty bitches, do revolve around me. You can’t help it. You can’t even mind your own business long enough to realize that nothing you say matters to me.”

She snarled like a shrieking wildcat as she launched at me. In one smooth motion, I reached back, grabbed the bowl of sangria from the counter, and threw the entire thing in her face.

Deathly silence fell. Manson looked stunned, his mouth open in an expression that was dangerously close to bursting into laughter. Everyone stared, wide-eyed, their mouths hanging open as Danielle stood dripping on the kitchen tile. She was gasping, blinking slowly as her mascara began to run.