There was a $23 service fee. I had $2. The cashier said the whole thing had to be in cash. Tried Duane reade ATM several times but it didn’t read card. Ran to pickles & pies ATM three blocks away and withdrew $60 from checking and ran back. There was a line. Female cashier waved to me and I waved and smiled. She said ‘just step over here’ and I walked to the moneygram phone. Female cashier asked who I was sending money to. I said ‘Jordan Castro.’ Male cashier said ‘that’s me!’ I said ‘oh my god, Jordan! I haven’t seen you in so long, you look so different!’ We laughed. Female cashier handed me ~18” receipt with reference number on it. Then everything was good. I thought ‘let’s push my luck while I’m at it.’ Asked her for quarters in exchange for $3. Said ‘I have a laundry…situation…’She wordlessly laid out little stacks of quarters then said ‘here you go.’ I said ‘woohoo thank you.’ She smiled and I walked out the door.

6:41pm: walking up stairs to apt. Winded.

6:46pm: Jordan emailed that it all worked out sweet ass hell yeah. Emailed back that this gave my day purpose…also things about wanting to get pounded by him…heheheh…damn want Jordan sex bad right now. Picturing him at grocery store receiving money and feeling happy, I was able to provide help for a good person, this is making me feel better, I am less wasteful. Surge of horniness. This is funny. Feeling horny due to these circumstances. Genuine horny…thing…imagining Jordan at my door and like, grabbing him, making out, damn. Hehhegehheheheh. Laying in bed with Jordan, ‘reading the newspaper,’ I thought. Haha. Both of us in ‘smoking jackets’ or fancy bathrobes, side-by-side on the bed with our legs extended after sex, holding newspapers, noncommittally quoting the stock market.

7:33PM: chelsea emailed something very sweet and thoughtful and funny and emotional. she is in curacao. fucking. so happy chelsea is in my life. wish everyone could know chelsea, or have a person like chelsea in their lives. people like chelsea make me want to keep going.

took pictures of myself in bathing suit from freshman year of high school. it smells like chlorine. it has always been tight around the waistband part. still gathers/bunches at waistband a little but all in all, not bad. not bad shitass. have always wanted one to have one of those inviting gaps between my upper thighs. why? so, uh…so the guys know…so they can more clearly see ‘where to put it’…i guess? no reason really. i have achieved inviting thigh gap. inviting thigh gap achieved. and just look at where’s it’s gotten me. ‘woohoo.’

took down ‘pee prevention fort.’ did 400 crunches, chewed 30mg adderall IR with incisors, opened fridge and a 12oz sugar-free red bull and zero calorie monster drink fell onto floor. opened the red bull over sink and tried to drink the fizz to help wash down adderall.