9:52AM: kneeled in front of fridge and ate bites of raw spirulina pie thing. tasted too rich. put it back. thought ‘catch and release.’ currently eating a banana to quell whale noises in stomach. really taking my time with this banana too, like, showing it a good time, being careful not to make any sudden movements while it rests on my calf.

9:57AM: i pointed and said ‘it’s coming from there.’ mom stood with surprising quickness and i followed her out to the balcony. she asked ‘when do you hear the sounds the baby makes?’ i said ‘not regularly, not lately. that’s a scary question.’ she said ‘oh no! no, no, no.’ i said ‘no, no, no, i mean like scary like david lynch, like he’d have someone say what you just said and then disappear or something.’ there was a noise. mom’s head darted in meerkat-like manner. i said ‘maybe it’s a burglar who has come to give us the lottery, wouldn’t that be exciting?’ mom smiled and made a face. felt attentive to silences between noises. i said ‘it’d be an ‘opposite’ kind of burglar.’

10:23AM: interested in never sleeping again maybe, dying…somehow…from that?

12:12PM: fedex-ing my tenant application form instead of giving to colin in person. doesn’t make sense to drive to NYC with incomplete portfolio. 24-year-old real estate mogul neighbor. ‘mogul’ is weird. feel like my hands are skeletal and ‘mogul’ right now. the capillaries or something look purple and webby and close to being on the other side of my skin with the rest of the world. think i’m thinking of ‘gollum.’

12:21PM: almost always have itunes open and almost never play music. i don’t know anyone who listens to less music than me. remember telling that to tao in a car, hearing ‘seems…depressing…’ after a few moments.

12:24PM: pictured the annoying hot girl from ‘girls’ saying ‘i LOOOOOVE old woman rickets.’ she’d go global with old woman rickets. take that shit global. that girl has nice teeth. if i were a guy and i saw her across a room i’d say ‘i’d like to take her out back, if you know what i mean’ to the guy next to me. he would know. people are always knowing things. they’re always saying things like that and understanding each other.

12:39PM: laying under blankets. can’t believe i took so long to do ‘laying’ or ‘blankets.’

12:48PM: banging noises have been replaced by bumping at a rhythm similar to this thing in the song. hm. i would pay someone to figure out what the song is, maybe. i almost can remember words.

12:53PM: the song is ‘a sweet summer’s night on hammer hill.’ listening now. it’s horrible when they say ‘boom-ba-boom.’ eyes watered when i felt like i couldn’t continue typing something as embarrassing as the last ‘boom’ of the rhythm sequence. it out-embarrassed me. i don’t think i’ve ever felt this intensely negative about a song, or felt too embarrassed to finish typing something. i kind of like how awful listening to it feels.