No, Xiaokai wanted to say—wanted to grab his shoulders and scream it in his face. No, you’re the one who’s hurting me the most. I already ruined you by making you fall in love with me. My parents killed your parents. I erased your feelings for Xingyu. I let you get involved in all of this when you never should have been. All of that, but at least you were largely safe through it all—and now you’ve beaten a man to death by the look of your hands, and for what? For me? For the person who destroyed everything good in your life? But of course none of that would come out of his mouth, and of course the first thing to come to mind was that conversation he’d had with Weiran when Xingyu found out Xiaokai’s role in the List, and of course there was only one way he knew how to respond: with cruelty. “So what?” he said. “I got hurt like that all the time. The only thing different about Bai Xue was that I was in love with him.” It was a lie, and for Xiaokai it was obviously a lie—Bai Xue had only ever been a window to freedom, an access to escape, an impossible dream—but Xingyu and Weiran were both staring at him with wide eyes, because why would Xiaokai lie to them? Why would he lie to them in a situation like this?

“Xiaokai?” Weiran’s voice was unsteady. “What do you mean, you were in love with him? I thought you didn’t…I mean, I thought—”

“You thought I couldn’t fall in love with people? Weiran, I just couldn’t fall in love with you.”

Weiran’s eyes were shiny. His hand dropped from Xingyu’s shirt.

“Go to hell, both of you,” Xiaokai said, driving the nail the rest of the way into this coffin he’d made for himself. “He Peilin!”

Driver He appeared at his side.

“Get me out of here. And you…” He glanced over his shoulder as Driver He supported him to the door. “Both of you can go fuck yourselves.”

“DO YOU WANT to go right away?” He Peilin asked. “If you would like, we can stop to get some clothing for you. I would also recommend you get some rest before I take you.”

“No, Driver He. We can go now.”

He Peilin gently helped Young Master Liu into the car. For a moment before he closed the door, he just looked down at the young man he’d come to love as his son, smiling softly. Young Master Liu looked up at him.

“Driver He?”

“Yes, Young Master Liu. I’ll take us now.”