Weiran finally couldn’t sit underneath Xiaokai’s gaze anymore; he stood and went to the room’s mini kitchen, deciding to busy himself with making tea. “Do you want anything?”

“No.” Xiaokai was still waiting for an answer, and Weiran could hear it in his voice.

“I didn’t tell him because it would’ve been too distracting. We’re trying to get revenge. And he…” Weiran shook his head.

“He what?”

“He didn’t feel the same. Doesn’t feel the same.”

“Mn. And he never will.”

Weiran shot a look at Xiaokai.

“Unless all you feel for him is lust,” said Xiaokai.

“What the hell are you talking about?” He was so pissed off he’d switched back to English, but Xiaokai just kept pushing through the conversation as if it didn’t affect him at all.

“The very idea of love was taken from him a long time ago. It was taken from me, too. The only thing they didn’t crush in him was logic, and the only thing they didn’t crush in me was my ability to fuck. Well, of course he’d be able to fuck you if you wanted, but he wouldn’t be able to give you anything else.” He sighed, his eyebrows drew together, his gaze flickered away from Weiran—“Neither of us would.”

Weiran was making enough tea for Xiaokai anyway. He brought the teapot and a couple cups from the set back to the living room. “What are you trying to say? That I’m screwing myself over if I pursue Xingyu? That he’s going to reject me and I’m going to have to cry myself to sleep?” His tone dripped with sarcasm. Xiaokai gave him a faint smile.

“Nothing as grand as that.”

“Then what?”

“Just that, if you really wanted to have meaningless sex, you might as well have it with the one who was trained to be the best.”

Weiran gaped at him. “You’re—propositioning me?”

“You bought time with me and never used it.”

“And that’s—that’s enough of a reason to proposition me? When you know how I feel about Xingyu?”

“I told you then that I was fine if you pretended you were fucking Xingyu. I’ve done a lot stranger.”

Weiran didn’t know if he was supposed to ask for clarification about that. He barely knew how to process what they were talking about.

“I could just blow you,” said Xiaokai.

“Why are you doing this?”

“I don’t know. Because I’m bored?”

“Why do you care so much about how I f—” He stumbled over the word. “—how I feel about Xingyu?”

“I’m just…curious about what it’s like.”

“To like someone?”