I looked into her eyes and saw such a rush of conflicting emotions that I didn’t know where to begin: her fear for her father, her grief for her mother, even a suspicion that perhaps her father was guilty. And what then? I hadn’t even come to terms with my own fears; I had no idea how to address hers too.

‘I don’t know,’ I confessed. ‘I don’t know what they think. But I know he didn’t do it. These people, they just …’ I waved my hand, unable to finish the sentence because my eyes were also seeping tears. The adrenalin had got me through the time in Lorelei’s house and the van with that foul man, but now I broke down next to her. I was glad she was there so I wasn’t alone.

We spent the evening on the sofa telling each other that we would hear Nick’s key in the lock any minute now, that he would saunter through the door, smile at seeing us together and make some joke about having escaped from NatSec’s cells. My cat Julius came in and wound himself around our ankles. I made myself feed him, and he did his best to show his affection afterwards, rubbing himself on our legs, but it meant nothing as the time stretched on and Nick never returned home.

Twice I slipped away to my bedroom – first to stow in my wardrobe the book and white carton I had found in Lorelei’s house; and then to open that book again, desperately staring at its contents. I think I was hoping for inspiration, a lightning bolt that would turn those letters and numbers into meaningful words and messages, but they remained a mystery.

At eleven o’clock I told Hazel it was time she went to bed and we would see her father in the morning. When she had got herself ready, I went in to see her and I realized just how young and vulnerable she was. Only fourteen. I stroked her hair and told her everything would be all right and she seemed to believe me. Yet, in the space of a day, the girl had lost both her parents and I, a virtual stranger, was all that was left for her.

9

All of the Republic of Great Britain is looking forward to today’s celebrations for Liberation Day. Dignitaries from the Soviet Union, France, Jugoslavia and our friends in Africa are among those attending to show their support and celebrate the day when the Red Army drove the Nazis from our shores. What a day it promises to be!

News broadcast, RGB Station 1,
Tuesday, 18 November 1952