Back Jailbird Save as PDF
Contents (117)
  1. Jailbird
  2. Caro Savage
  3. Chapter 1
  4. Chapter 2
  5. Chapter 3
  6. Chapter 4
  7. Chapter 5
  8. Chapter 6
  9. Chapter 7
  10. Chapter 8
  11. Chapter 9
  12. Chapter 10
  13. Chapter 11
  14. Chapter 12
  15. Chapter 13
  16. Chapter 14
  17. Chapter 15
  18. Chapter 16
  19. Chapter 17
  20. Chapter 18
  21. Chapter 19
  22. Chapter 20
  23. Chapter 21
  24. Chapter 22
  25. Chapter 23
  26. Chapter 24
  27. Chapter 25
  28. Chapter 26
  29. Chapter 27
  30. Chapter 28
  31. Chapter 29
  32. Chapter 30
  33. Chapter 31
  34. Chapter 32
  35. Chapter 33
  36. Chapter 34
  37. Chapter 35
  38. Chapter 36
  39. Chapter 37
  40. Chapter 38
  41. Chapter 39
  42. Chapter 40
  43. Chapter 41
  44. Chapter 42
  45. Chapter 43
  46. Chapter 44
  47. Chapter 45
  48. Chapter 46
  49. Chapter 47
  50. Chapter 48
  51. Chapter 49
  52. Chapter 50
  53. Chapter 51
  54. Chapter 52
  55. Chapter 53
  56. Chapter 54
  57. Chapter 55
  58. Chapter 56
  59. Chapter 57
  60. Chapter 58
  61. Chapter 59
  62. Chapter 60
  63. Chapter 61
  64. Chapter 62
  65. Chapter 63
  66. Chapter 64
  67. Chapter 65
  68. Chapter 66
  69. Chapter 67
  70. Chapter 68
  71. Chapter 69
  72. Chapter 70
  73. Chapter 71
  74. Chapter 72
  75. Chapter 73
  76. Chapter 74
  77. Chapter 75
  78. Chapter 76
  79. Chapter 77
  80. Chapter 78
  81. Chapter 79
  82. Chapter 80
  83. Chapter 81
  84. Chapter 82
  85. Chapter 83
  86. Chapter 84
  87. Chapter 85
  88. Chapter 86
  89. Chapter 87
  90. Chapter 88
  91. Chapter 89
  92. Chapter 90
  93. Chapter 91
  94. Chapter 92
  95. Chapter 93
  96. Chapter 94
  97. Chapter 95
  98. Chapter 96
  99. Chapter 97
  100. Chapter 98
  101. Chapter 99
  102. Chapter 100
  103. Chapter 101
  104. Chapter 102
  105. Chapter 103
  106. Chapter 104
  107. Chapter 105
  108. Chapter 106
  109. Chapter 107
  110. Chapter 108
  111. Chapter 109
  112. Chapter 110
  113. Chapter 111
  114. Acknowledgments
  115. More from Caro Savage
  116. About the Author
  117. About Boldwood Books

But first things first. He smiled at her.

‘Have you done your homework?’

She frowned in puzzlement.

‘Your thought diary?’ he said.

‘Oh that. Sorry, I completely forgot about it.’

He sighed. This didn’t come as a total surprise to him.

‘Like I said in our previous meeting, Bailey, if you want to get better, then you have to want to help yourself.’

‘I’m sorry, Doctor. It genuinely slipped my mind. I got sidetracked with some other stuff.’

He gestured at the sheets of paper on the table in front of him. ‘These are the tests you did last time you were here. Remember? The results are quite revealing.’

‘Revealing?’ A wary look.

‘Yes,’ he said. ‘You were referred to me because you threw yourself off a balcony. An attempt at suicide or self-harm tells me that you’re clearly troubled in some way. Looking at your test results, I’m wondering if this is down to a traumatic experience which happened to you in the past.’

He saw a flash of something in her eyes. Raw emotion. Pain. Fear. But then, just as quickly, it was gone, the grey eyes staring at him cool and calm once again.

‘You can tell that just from this test?’ she said, a sceptical tone in her voice.

In truth, he didn’t need a test to know that something unpleasant was locked up inside that head of hers. With her mannerisms and her scar, which he guessed was the outcome of some violent encounter, it was hardly an outlandish assumption to make. And with almost twenty years’ experience as a forensic psychologist he had become particularly attuned to reading people like her.

‘Would you like to talk about it?’ he asked.

‘Not particularly.’

‘Traumatic experiences, if unaddressed, can be the cause of major mental health issues. They can lead to suicide attempts, self-harm and other highly detrimental behaviour.’ He paused. ‘Have you heard of something called post-traumatic stress disorder?’

She nodded and looked away.

‘When we undergo a particularly traumatic experience, the mind can compartmentalise that experience. It’s like a defence mechanism in order to help us preserve a functional sense of self and prevent emotionally unacceptable material from entering our consciousness. But because those memories aren’t properly integrated, they’re not anchored in any context of time or place like normal memories are. That means that when they intrude, which can happen quite suddenly, it feels like—’

‘Like they’re happening right now,’ she said in a quiet voice. ‘Like you’re re-living them. Like you’re actually there all over again, seeing the same things, feeling the same feelings, smelling the same smells.’

Excitement gripped him. At last, he was getting somewhere! He had finally broken through that defensive shell of hers.

‘Yes, Bailey! That’s precisely it! I’m so glad you understand what I’m saying. You see, talking about it, although it might be painful, can help to reintegrate those traumatic memories into your consciousness and thus get rid of those unpleasant intrusions.’

He saw the shutters come down – a tautening in her jaw muscles, a sudden frostiness in her eyes.