‘I’m making my disgusted face.’ I pulled her close, put an arm around her, tipped her head forward so I could kiss the top. ‘Let’s not tell anybody about this conversation, because if anything bad does happen to Gaston, they’re going to look at you.’

‘I love the sex, that’s all. Do you think I could be addicted to him sexually?’

‘Eww,’ I said, for the second time that night. ‘Now I’m making my I’m-about-to-be-sick face.’

‘Seriously, Holly.’

‘I absolutely do think you’re addicted, and you’re in desperate need of therapy.’

‘I can’t get over him.’ Her voice choked, and she started to cry. She curled up on her side of the bench and put her head in my lap, and I played with her hair. When she sat up again, I took her hand.

‘I’m cold,’ she said. Her teeth were chattering, and I snuggled her close. Neither of us had remembered to bring mittens.

‘There’s nothing of you to keep warm. Shall we go in, get another drink? Something hot.’

‘Holly?’

‘Yes, Milly?’

‘I’m really going to try to stop fucking him.’

‘Okay,’ I said.

‘Will you be mad at me if I can’t?’

‘Of course not.’ I gently touched a finger to her cheek, to wipe away a tear that she’d missed. ‘But I’ll be mad at him no matter what you do.’

The pub was quiet. Milly and I stood at the bar beneath the silver tankards that hung like a string of Christmas decorations. They were entwined with red and green ribbons and strands of gold beads. We got served straightaway, then made our way to the wood fire, where we stripped off our coats and huddled close. I sipped warm apple juice and Milly had mulled wine. The scent of cinnamon and cloves steamed up at us, and I was not feeling at all sick.

This was a quiet place to tell her my news, but I hesitated, when she was so traumatised by Gaston. At the same time, I was scared she’d be hurt that I had waited so long. Not to tell her immediately would make that longer still. Plus, she’d see it as yet more evidence that Zac the Evil was dictating everything I did, and how and when I did it.

I took a deep breath and leaned in close. ‘There’s something I need to tell you,’ I started to say. But before I could go any further, she froze. I turned to look at whatever had struck her with such horror. My words stuck in my throat.

‘Hello, beautiful,’ Zac said to me. ‘Hello, Milly,’ he said to Milly.

Milly stood. I made an effort to convert the sadness I was feeling into a cheerful tone, turning the inflection up on the last word. ‘Oh no – no – don’t go yet.’

‘I have to.’

‘I was going to drive you home.’