Millie hasn’t stopped pushing me, although now she pushes me to try a new book club or sign up for an online class. But, I realise, somewhere between now and then, I seem to have stopped believing her. I started to feel like Millie was my younger sister instead of my older one. I cheered her on and encouraged her to take up space but forgot to do the same for myself. I forgot that I could shine just as brightly as she can. As much as I feel like it’s her fault for taking up space, I let her do it. I forgot what it feels like to make myself proud and make her proud along the way.

Pippa is right, I can’t keep holding myself back. I can’t keep worrying about what other people think. If Florida was any indication, maybe being myself will work out. But no matter what happens, it’s time to tell Hugh the truth. I picture broaching the topic with him, being more vulnerable than I ever have, admitting that I did something wrong, and I know that I will be proud of myself if I have the hard conversation. Millie would be proud of me too. There’s just one last consideration needling at my subconscious.

I know Hugh well enough by now to know that he won’t use this to sabotage Millie’s career . . . right?

Chapter 24

We pop out of the cluster of mangroves and arrive at a deserted beach on the south side of the island. I make my way over to Hugh, but he avoids me, ducking into a conversation with Natalie again. We make eye contact just as he sits down next to her. He looks away, but not before his mouth flattens into a thin line. I grit my teeth with exasperation. I know he’s hurt, but I don’t know how to figure out what to do next if I can’t even talk to him . . . How am I supposed to decide whether to tell him the truth?

We lounge around the beach and stick our feet in the water, only relaxing for twenty minutes before Vanessa ushers us along. We head down a different path towards a paved road where a large white van waits for us.

‘Everyone in,’ she says, ushering us into seats.