‘Friends . . .’ He repeats, his eyes glazed over, turning darker with every second.

I don’t want to think about it, so I turn towards the door. I can’t meet Hugh’s eyes. My gaze flits over the stuff scattered across my bed and I see the journal Millie made for me. I remember the real reason I’m here – the reason I keep conveniently forgetting about, and Hugh keeps distracting me from.

I am here to do something for my sister. I am pretending to be her, but that doesn’t mean that I’m no longer me. I am not someone who lets a random fling distract her for a job. No matter how deep in my bones I want to do to Hugh what he just did to me, no matter how badly I ache for it to happen again, no matter how much my body knows, although my brain can’t admit it, that I’ve never felt a desire so strong for anyone else, I can’t let my feelings keep clouding my vision.

Clutching my towel around my waist, I slip out of our room. I make a promise to myself for what feels like the thousandth time: if I can’t tell Hugh the truth, which I can’t, then no more letting him distract me.

Chapter 22

‘Are you sure this is a good idea?’ Pippa asks Miguel, squinting out at the horizon. Storm clouds have bunched together in the distance, forming a menacing line of grey.

‘It’s better underwater,’ Miguel says brightly. ‘Less chance to be seasick.’ He gives me a sideways glance with a grin. I nod at him, affirming that I too do not want to be trapped on the boat with people who are sick. We haven’t talked much over the last day. He’s spent a lot of time with Derek and Natalie, talking about God knows what.

‘OK,’ says Pippa, although she clearly doesn’t believe it. She shimmies into her stinger suit and straps on her BCD. I follow suit. Hugh and I have hardly spoken since I left the room earlier, but neither of us found another buddy. We do our buddy check silently. Hugh completes his quicker than ever but still manages to be very thorough. I squirm with discomfort when he triple-checks my regulator. Being so close to him is excruciating.

The group launches themselves into the water quickly, Derek even forgoing his camera, all of us thinking we either wanted to be inside or underwater when the rain hits.