The only cute guy in the group is Ralph, but I went on one date with him and realized he’s the most annoying person I’ve ever met. He felt the need to explain everything to me—how Wi-Fi works, how commercials work, how the library works—like I wasn’t an actual person with the ability to access Google. If that wasn’t bad enough, he kissed like a slobbering dog. Today, he’s sitting across from Alicia, arms crossed sullenly. What, does he think he’s here to judge Alicia’s performance? Ugh, I can’t stand him.

“I asked Alicia to come back here because I wanted to show you guys how bright your lives can be,” Julie says, leaning forward in that earnest way of hers. “I know that I tell you guys this every week, but HIV isn’t a death sentence. You just—”

“Have to take your meds,” we say, almost in unison.

“I don’t want to sound like a mom,” Alicia says, laughter in her voice. “But it’s really important. I almost don’t even think about it. You just take them at the same time every day, like with any other medication, you know?”

All I can think about is the birth control pills Lydia just started taking.

“I used to have a friend I met in support group,” she says, her face falling a bit. “We hit eighteen, and he decided he wasn’t going to take his pills anymore. He said he was feeling fine and didn’t need them.”

The room is silent. We all know what that leads to.

“He got pneumonia, and couldn’t breathe without a tube in his mouth,” she says, staring at the floor in front of her. “Something happened with his eyes after he stopped getting enough oxygen. He was surrounded by people he loved, but he wasn’t able to tell. It took eight months for him to die.”

I hate hearing about this. I know it’s a real concern, but I’m not skipping my pills. Is it really necessary to suffer through the punishment of hearing this over and over?

“Sometimes horrible things happen,” Alicia says. “But amazing, exciting things happen all the time. I do what I love every day and live with two people I love. I have my husband and my son and a job I love. I guess I’m saying that it isn’t all doom and gloom. I’m here to prove that—you guys can ask me anything you want.”

My hand shoots up before I can remember not to look desperate. Julie nods at me.

“So, like,” I say. “This might be a little weird.”

“That’s fine.” Alicia smiles. “I don’t mind weird.”

“Okay,” I say. “Um, was it hard to, like…uh, conceive your son?”

The only person looking at me like I’m weird is Ralph. I count that as a win.