I hold back a groan. Maybe I would say something if I were completely sure that Miles likes girls. Whenever I see him at rehearsal, he asks me about another musical. I’ve never met a straight guy who cares about musicals.

I know that stuff like the way he dresses and how he talks doesn’t make him gay. But I still have this feeling. Maybe it’s the musicals. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s always nice to everyone. Maybe it’s because I’ve never seen him with a girl. Ugh. If only I’d gone to a coed boarding school, then I’d know how to deal with this shit.

“It’s just not that simple,” I say, lowering my voice. “You guys make everything seem easy.”

When I’m around Claudia and Lydia, I feel cool. But feeling cool isn’t enough. There’s no reason for Miles to say more than a few words to me. I’m mostly fine with it; I don’t care about chasing after a boy. It’s just that part of me aches when I see him. There’s a reason why everyone is drawn to him—during the rehearsals, in the halls—but I can’t exactly say what it is. He just exists, and that’s enough. I wish I could do that, too.

CHAPTER 3

After the last bell of the day rings, I head toward the auditorium for rehearsal. I can’t tell if I’m into theater because of Lin-Manuel Miranda, like everyone else, or because I actually like it. Probably a combination of both. If I didn’t enjoy it, I don’t think I’d be able to spend two hours after school every day working on this musical.

“All right, come together, everyone,” Ms. Klein says. During school hours, she teaches chemistry, so she’s not exactly a theater expert, though I’ve been trying not to judge. She continues, “I think we’re doing fine, mostly. Rent is a difficult show to do at a high school level, and I’m proud of how far we’ve come already.”

The members of the cast and crew gather around her in a weird half circle. Mr. Palumbo stands beside her with his hands folded. He’s a small man with a big belly and bald head. I feel like he has more command of the room than Ms. Klein, even though he isn’t speaking. He catches my eye and winks.

Mr. Palumbo is probably the coolest teacher I’ve ever had. I’m in his music class, but during my first few days here, he let me hang out in his room during my study hall period. Most student directors get chosen after doing school shows for a while, but he chose me after a rousing debate about a potential film adaptation of Wicked. Now here we are.