‘Now,’ he said, putting his own drink can down then standing up and brushing the crumbs from his jeans. ‘Now, Rachel, we have a little fun.’

Chapter Forty-Seven

Elizabeth

Michael had called to see me that morning. Bringing supplies from home. I blushed at the thought of his poking through my drawers, packing underwear and nighties for me. He’d brought with him a bag from Boots, too – containing toiletries, a toothbrush and hairbrush.

‘If you need anything else, just text me and I’ll bring it next time I come in,’ he’d said.

He’d looked awful. Tired. Stressed. I’d asked him if he was okay.

‘The kids are very upset,’ he’d told me. ‘They’re scared they’re not going to see you again. Ava slept beside me last night. She cried herself to sleep. I think you being sick has brought up a lot of memories for them of when Laura died. I think I’d fooled myself into thinking they were doing okay now, that they’d managed in that way children do, but then this happens …’

From the look on his face, the dark circles under his eyes, I’d wondered if the children weren’t the only ones dealing with the ongoing trauma of Laura’s death.

‘Bring them in,’ I’d said, cringing at the slurring of my voice. It had improved, but talking still required a mammoth effort.

He’d looked at me; I could see he was sizing me up. Wondering if it would be any reassurance at all to the children to see their grandmother in a hospital bed, one side of her face still drooping, her left side still weak. Needing to be helped by two staff and a walker to make it to the bathroom.

‘I don’t want to worry them,’ he’d said and I could tell he hated telling me that. That he knew it would hurt me, even if I knew he was doing the right thing.

‘In a day or so?’ I’d said.

He’d nodded. ‘Yes, I think that would be a good idea,’ he’d said, but I knew he would be playing it all by ear.

‘I’m sorry I can’t stay,’ he’d said. ‘But I’ve work to get to. I’ll try to get in later, but if you need me …’

‘I know, thank you,’ I’d said.

‘Your sister’ll be arriving later, so you might get a visit from her,’ he added.

I’d smiled, a lopsided smile that caused him to frown. I was tired again. I’d wanted to sleep. He was just leaving the room, when I’d felt my eyelids start to droop and I’d drifted off.