Inside my house, Flavia and Erinn are running around, giggling their heads off, and Mother is sitting on the floor. The twins squeal in delight when they see me and run faster, feet stamping on the padded floor.

“How was it?” Mother asks.

I nod enthusiastically and crouch beside her.

“It was good.”

She smiles, but her lips haven’t curled the same way in the two months since Father died.

“Are you hungry?”

“Yeah.”

I stay with my sisters while Mother is in the kitchen. I pay attention to their game: they aren’t just running in circles, they’re playing tag. Whenever one touches the other, they reverse direction and resume the chase.

Mother comes back into the front room. The twins pile into her lap, licking their lips and begging for a bite of the sandwich she brought me.

“Do you have plans tonight?” Mother asks.

“I was going to stay here.”

Like always.

My eyes drift over to the door and stay fixed on it. I have two distinct memories of that door. The first was four years ago, the summer Ladia Purnell entered my life. The second memory is the morning Father walked out because of the emergency on Belvun, only days after he met Erinn and Flavia for the first time.

A hovercraft roars above the house, engines flaring in the dry air. Lieutenant Hofhen must be leaving Cornell. I’d love to fly in one of those. Leaves you breathless, seeing it all from up there, Father once said. Humbles you, even.

I still don’t believe that. My life gets worse no matter how hard I fight. Just when I think I’m back in control, it crashes down. How can I appreciate not dying with Father? Where has it left me? There are no more stories to hear, no more adventures to imagine. If I’m accepted into the Embassy, I’ll have to make my journey alone.

Chapter Two

It’s been four days since I took the Placement Report. The results will be announced at eight o’clock, only minutes away. If my holotab doesn’t light up, I don’t know what I’ll do with my life. I have no other plans.

I need to escape.

Mother cuts apart the last of her Killari beef sausages and swallows them one by one. I’ve not sure if she knows what goes on in my head. She never shows any sign that she recognizes how desperate I am to leave. Maybe I’m just good at covering it up. But it pains me to think about leaving them behind, her and the twins, because it’s not them I’m trying to escape.

I hope she doesn’t think that.

7:58…7:59.